(we look happy in our family portrait)

i'm feeling like i've fallen behind

While she was proud of her friends and the incredibly happy family they seemed to have formed, Bora couldn't help but feel a little jealous.

Once upon a time, she thought that Handong and her would end up living happily (for)ever after. They had known each other for a while, both coming from two of the most important vampire families, and they had so many things in common.

If only Bora had been braver.

But as years passed and none of the girls made a move, they settled in their routine as best friends.

And then came Minji.

While they were finishing college, most covens fled the city when news of vampire hunters came about, wanting to maintain their centuries long legacies. Bora and Handong's families were one of them, they pleaded to the girls to flee with them, but both women were stubborn as hell.

They refused to run away like cowards and abandon the great life they had going in the city; their parents had no choice but to leave them behind.

One night, as Bora and Handong walked home, they heard a blood curling scream. They ran towards the source and found a masked figure standing over a woman's bleeding body.

The figure ran away at the sight of them, Bora was about to give chase but the sight of the life leaving the red-haired woman made her stop.

"We have to save her", Handong kneeled next to the woman and tried to find the bleeding wound.

Bora knew there was not much to do for the woman, even if they ran as fast as they could to the hospital, she wouldn't survive.

With a shake of her head, and a heavy heart, Bora put a hand on Handong's shoulder, "There's nothing we could do for her".

What Bora didn't know though, was that there was something about the woman that called to Handong, she couldn't explain it but there was this weird feeling on the back of her mind, and as the woman opened her eyes and made eye contact with her, Handong knew her choice was made.

Now, 10 years later, Handong and Minji welcomed their newly adopted daughter Shuxin to their home.

After Handong turned Minji, life for the trio had been rough for a while, they had to teach Minji what it meant to be a vampire and how to adapt to the completely different life that they led. Along the way, Bora saw how Minji and Handong inevitably fell in love with each other, and the day before their wedding, Handong confessed to Bora that for all she knew Minji was the love of her life, she told Bora about the weird feeling in the back of her mind when they met and how, even though it was prohibited to turn a vampire without the council's approval, as soon as their eyes met Handong's instinct told her that the only way for Minji to survive was to be turned into one of them.

Yes, once upon a time Bora thought her and Handong were meant to each other, but once she saw the way her friend looked at Minji as she walked down the aisle, like she held all the answers of the universe in her hands, all those thoughts flew through the window.

Now, a little bit drunk from the weird (bloody) drinks that Handong had gotten from their local friendly witch, Yoohyeon, to celebrate, Bora was feeling a little bit drunk and nostalgic.

She watched from afar how Minji chased a five year old Shuxin around their yard, a big smile on both of their faces, a smile that she saw reflected in Handong, who stood on the side talking with some of their college friends.

"Look!", someone yelled in the distance and everyone started pointing at the sky.

Bora looked up and saw what seemed to be shooting star, from her periphery she saw Handong and Minji hugging a wide eyed Shuxin.

"Hurry! Make a wish!"

I want what they have, I want a family of my own, I want to be happy.

With a shake of her head, Bora downed the rest of her drink, she was a grown up now (and had been for several decades) and it was foolish for her to still believe in shooting stars making your wishes come true.

"Auntie Bora! Come play with me!", Shuxin's hand tugging her pants broke her from her dark musings, her previously serious face was replaced by a wide smile as the girl lead her through the yard.

(Still, she couldn't help the pang on her chest at the thought of being on the outside looking in, forever).

Maybe it was a god, or some other great power from the universe, but Bora would get her wish granted one way or another.

Soon.

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title taken from: the wonder years - passing through a screen door

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