Regrets Of A Broken Heart : A Short Story (Completed)

His Regrets

HIS REGRETS........

Kanina pa ako nandito sa opisina. At kanina pa rin akong tulala. Napapikit ako madiin. At animo'y naririnig ko pa ang sabi Lauren kanina..

... Mahal kita.

... Mahal kita.

... Mahal kita.

... Mahal kita.

... Mahal kita.

Napasabunot ako out of frustration. Damn!

Alam ko naman sa sarili kong mahal ko pa rin sya. Mahal na mahal. I never stopped loving her. I thought I did, when I ran away for 5 years. I thought I already digged that feelings six feet below the ground. I loved her the first day I met her. I love her when he made ne the happiest man alive when she sais 'YES'. And I still love her even for the fact that she shattered my whole being to pieces...

But my anger swallowed that love. I despise her. I loathe her.

Sinaktan nya ako. And that's enough reason to avenge.

She accused me of being a cheater. Ilang beses nya akong pinahiya at pinagmukang tanga. Pero tang ina lang! Wala ng mas sasakit pa sa katotohanang pinagpalit nya ako sa bestfriend nya.... What's worst, WALA AKONG GINAWANG MASAMA!

At sa tuwing maalala ko yun. Nadadagdagan lang ang galit ko sa kanya.

Lalo pa akong namuhi sa kanya nang kinasabwat nya sina mommy at daddy to tie me in this fucking arranged marriage. Bullshit! Ano ako laruan? Curse her!

Kaya ginamit ko ang oportunidad na'yon para pasakitan sya. To get even. To make her feel the way I felt when she dumped like a trash na wala akong ginagawang masama.

I know she's trying to get me back. But I'm not a fool. She can't trick me again. Dalang dala na ako sa kanya. At isa pa.... Ayoko nang masaktan....

Kaya I let her taste her own dose of medicine. She accused me of cheating? Then I'll prove her right. Kaya nagdadala ako ng mga babae sa bahay and make it our sex den. I was indeed triumphant whenever I pain creeps in her eyes.

But the more I hurt the more I felt the pain.

Whenever I see her cry, parang dinudurog ang puso ko. And I know her 'first time'  was a nightmare to her. I forced her. She's in deep pain but I am blinded with so much anger.

She confronted me about the women I brought to the house and having sex with them. Hindi ko na daw sya nirespeto. Screw that woman! How dare her to preach me of respecting her? Bakit? Did she respected me nung pinahiya nya ako sa harap ng bahay nila? Sa harap ng mga kaibigan nya?

Kaya nagdilim ang paningin ko. I fucked her that time. I almost raped her. No. I raped her. She silently cried under the curse of my wrath. But I felt so guilty that time. Kaya hindi muna ako umuwi sa bahay ng ilang araw. My conscience and my hurt ego were fighting like crazy. I am guilty yet I am furious of her.

And every time, the hurt ego won the battle.. . Kaya lalo ko syang nasasaktan.

When she told me she's pregnant, honestly, I was scared and believe me I was happy at the same time. But my fears won. Pano kung madamay sa galit ko ang bata? Pano kung ipagpalit na naman nya ako sa ibang lalaki?

Umiwas ako sa kanya. I drowned myself to work and alcohol. My life is a mess because of her. I love her but I loathe her.

Kating  kati akong samahan sya sa check ups nya. But my ego won't allow me. Baka makita nyang lumalambot ako ay makakita na naman sya ng pagkakataong saktan ako. Kaya tiniis ko sya. Sila ng anak ko. Pero hindi ko na napigilan ng narinig ko silang naguusap ni Joy. Nabanggit ni Lauren na pwede ng malaman ang gender ng baby namin.