Bloodless Hands. BNHA (VILLAIN reader)

Chapter 33; Losing Everyone For The Better.

WARNING: Dark Themes, including self harm  and other mental health issues

When I came too my whole body hurt, it hurt to move at all. "(Y/N)?" I heard a soft voice call out to me, I knew his voice instantly.
"Daichi..." I felt him grab my hand gently, I look down at his hand and then up at him. He had a sad smile on his lips. Tears stained his eyes. "How's my brave brother?" I move my hand up placing it on his cheek he pushed my hand and quickly embraced me. I held him close to me ignoring the pain all over my skin. Tears soak my hospital gown, his hands fists gripping me for dear life. I gently pet his head and start to hum the lullaby softly. The door opens slowly as someone clears their throat. I glance up, my brother pulling away. My 3 best friends walk in all looking sad and relieved, I smiled gently at them. "I've never been in a hospital before?" I let out a quiet laugh.
"Happy to have you back." Sven smiled.
"You were out for two days, Boss." Nyoko said sitting on the bed next to me. Flowers in hand.
"You always make us worry." Aaron comments looking down at me.
"You always help me." I comment back to him, and sit up. "Why do you all looked so worried."

That's when I found out I'd ruined everything, my heart dropped but I smile stayed on my face. Tears swelled my eyes as the feeling of loneliness filled me. The teachers came in with the police, I knew there was no getting out of this one. I had to say goodbye to the people I tried to make connections with, because I can't help but kill the people who wrong me. To feel their lives in my hands and hoping to be spared. The voices of everyone was muffled nothing they said made it through the heaviness of my thoughts. A laugh slipped my lips, my mind fuzzed over. "Ms. (L/N)?" AllMight asked looking at me, my eyes moved from my lap to the crowd.
"I'm fucked." I mumbled not caring that I shouldn't be cussing. "I'm so fucked!" I grab my arms, reality taking hold of me. I was messed up, my thoughts were incomplete and murky. My eyes were locked onto my hands, my once blood stained hands.
"(Y/N)... calm down." My brother says sitting besides me, he placed his hand on my own.
"I'm fucking monster." I whisper to him, he only frowns. "I killed so many people. So many bullets went through me." I grab his shoulders tightly, my sore body screamed at me not to move. "I felt so powerful to have the men that planned to murder me, that wanted me dead!" I pause, I slight smile crossing my lips, "to have their lives in the palms of my hands and end their fates too early." He looked down at me in pity and sorrow, as if I had died myself. I released him from my grasp and looked at the heros, I knew my haunting smile and eyes only made them worry more.
"(Y/N)..." Aaron spoke softly, I looked at him. "I... I'll... miss you." He hesitated as if he had something else he wished to say.
"You'll be leaving for the other school in a few hours, your brother already packed everything from your dorm." Aizawa said looking at me.

Before long I was alone in the room, my thoughts were rampant and twisted into a dark spiderweb. The suffocating black quicksand I'd started to dig my way out of was now piling higher and thicker then it ever has. I stood up and grabbed the clothing that sat on a small seat in the corner. I moved slowly, my muscles hurt at every wrong move I made. Slurs quietly left my mouth as I dressed myself, once I was done I moved to the bathroom. Then, I saw myself in the mirror... I felt this fleeing feeling fill my mind before just disappearing. I looked like death itself, my eyes were tired and sunken, my skin pale and sickening. I splash water on my face and take in the everything. "I've fucked up my whole life." I sigh and walk out of the small bathroom. "I need something to destress." I walk to my bag of things and start to shifting through it for cigarettes. I find nothing. "FUCK!" Irritation and annoyance over coming me, I hit the wall with my bag... hard. I grab my own throat and tighten, my windpipe was in pain and my skin starting to rip open.

"(Y/N), are you ready to go—" Aaron paused, I release my hands and looked at my bloody fingertips. "You've made a mess." He walks over to me, placing a hand on my head. "It'll be okay. I'm always on call away, you know that... right?" I looked up at him, my neck wounds healed only bruises remain. He sat down next to me, "What's up?"
"I'm a fucking mess..." Anger willing up, "I can't do anything good! All I do is dig a bigger hole for myself!" Tears starting to hit the tiles.
"Listen to me," he paused grabbing my hand, "no matter how much you 'fuck up' I'll always be there for you." He smiles softly, his tone slightly sad. "And I'll watch of the other two." He winks cause a slight laugh escape my throat. "Thank you... Aaron Aly."

Then I left the room, and was escorted out of the hospital, to a police car. Everyone I knew and befriended were there, I take a deep breath. "Shinsou, I think you'll be a great hero, and thank you for just listening to me." I smiled moving on, "Izuku, I'll be honest, you are a great person. I hope you never change." "Todoroki, I didn't talk to you much but, I'm happy you were just there for me if needed." I think for a moment knowing a can't drag this on. "Honestly all my classmates deserve Success." I then look at my friends and partners in crime. "Nyoko," I walk over grabbing her hands, "you are an adorable, bad ass, individual, don't stop inventing just because I'm gone." She nods tearing up, she grabs one of her hair pins holding her right pig tale up, placing it in my hand. I merely smile back. "Sven, my ride or die, best kind of annoying, computer guy, I hope one day we can still work together."
"I'll get my hair cut in memory of you." He comments, make me ruffle his hair a little.
"Maybe then you can get a lover, shaggy." He only rolls his eyes in response. "And, Aaron, the strong man with the heart of a teddy bear, You better keep your promise." I say smiling softly to him. I then see my brother, the only thing I can never do bad in my eyes, most of my heart is for him. "Dai-Dai, I want you to watch yourself and lean on Sven, Nyoko, and Aaron, anytime you need too. As your sister I want you to be happy and always be yourself, but as your guardian I want you to stay strong and safe at all costs. I love you so much, no matter how far I go," I pause tears starting to fall from my eyes, my hand against his cheek trying to taken in every detail of his face. "I will always be watching out for you, In your eyes there is doubt, As you try to figure it out, But that's not what life is about. Live your true life brother. You'll make me so proud, I know it." I hug him and he cries in my arms, not wanting to let me go. "Goodbye, Daichi." I mumble to him.
"G-Goodbye, (Y/N). I love you." He chokes out through his tears.

I pull away and look at everyone there, "see you on the other side." I was placed in the car and taken away from all the people I knew and loved. Not to see them for the rest of my school life, besides Daichi once a month, at least that's what I believe they said to me.