Bloodless Hands. BNHA (VILLAIN reader)

Chapter 21; Explaining

I sit on my bed, I was scared to talk to them. I was going to tell them I'm going straight, no more tricks or scams. I wanted to be happy with myself, and proud of what I was doing. I listen to the agonizing ringing, after what felt like years, a voice picks up.
"Hello? (Y/N)?" He sounded winded.
"Hey, Aaron, where is everyone else?" I ask calmly.
"Umm, at their homes, I'm in my workout room, are you okay?"
"Oh okay and I'm fine, I promise." My throat suddenly started to feel dry and strained. "I-I can't... do this... anymore, Aaron." Tears started to slip down my cheeks.
"We know." His voice was low and quiet.
"Y-you do? Really?" I stood up abruptly.
"And we all agreed that will continue to work for you no matter what path you take. I'll always be your trainer." I felt a smile stretch across my face.
"I-I'm glad to hear that." I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath. "Hey, tell everyone, I miss them."
"You got it, boss."

I ended the call, my hand fell to my side. I look to my balcony, my eyes sitting on the trees. This stress I've built up for years was finally melting away, but... I was still a killer and this red that stained my mind and soul will never be whipped clean. I can scrub and scrub but my past will cause me to jump to conclusions and suspect the worst outcomes. A knock fills my room, I quickly look over. My eyes instinctively look at the door nob, I shake my head slowly and sigh. "Come in." I said with confidence, the door opens revealing Iida. My eyes probably looked harsher then I'd meant them too.
"As the class representative, I'm here to find out your intentions." He stood up straighter, my eyes were on his.
"My intentions are to.. to move on from my old life. Be someone I can be proud of when looking in the mirror." My voice became strong and my stare never left his.
"I see, I believe you. Have a good night, (L/N)." He left room without another word or glance.
I fell asleep that night with the intentions of telling everyone my life, what lead me to do what I did.

...Timeskip; morning...

I leave my room, dressed and early. My hands shook slightly, I knew everyone was downstairs, socializing and being happy. I was about to crush that. My eyes had broken veins making my (E/C) eyes more dulled down then normal. As soon as I enter the common area, everyone went silent. I knew they hated me, I hated myself. "Listen I-"
"You don't get to talk, villain." Bakugo spat out, I felt my anger raise. I tightened my fist, my nails suddenly broke skin. Blood ran across my fingers.
"(Y/N), you're bleeding-" Deku said before I cut him off.
"Shut up, Bakugo. I came down here to explain myself, not to pick a fight." I sent a dark glare at him, look at Izuku and soften. "I'm fine, Izuku. See." I held my hands up, already healed up.

I looked to everyone else, "you all hate me and call me whatever shit you want after I explain myself." I swallow and take a deep breath. "You know what the news knows but that's not even half of all the shit I've been through." I sat down on a chair, everyone's eyes were on me. "I just told my brother this yesterday, but you all deserve an explanation."
"Me and my brother grew up in foster homes all over Japan, my parents died in a car crash when I was 3. I was shuffled around for years before I was dropped off in the house I'd first kill in. She'd abuse us, use us, for our quirks. I was her favorite to steal from, she'd use me to age down for months. Before my second quirk final showed it self. It killed her, but I had to protect my little brother. He was bloody and beaten under her at the time. The cops just turned a blind eye and sent us to a new hole." They were all silent, I took a deep breath and tightened my hands once more.
"Next few homes weren't too bad, just normal kids picking on kids. But my last home was different, the people who were supposed to love us, didn't. They would degrade us, make us feel less so they could feel higher. But when they put a cigarette out on Daichi cheek, I left that night. With him. I then dedicated to supporting him. I never let him starve or be cold, but I let myself. I stole for money. I worked underground for money. I killed bad people for money." My eyes darkened towards the end, "Ive watched people I care for die in front of my eyes, so I worked alone. To avoid anymore unnecessary deaths."

Everyone was silent, I stood without looking at any of them. "I've been drowning and the people's I killed blood for years, all hope stripped from my grasped. So pardon me for trying to change and be a better person, someone I can be proud of, that my mother's ghost can be proud of." I walk out the front door, 'damn this shit.' My eyes move to the sky, I sat down on the steps leading off the porch.
"Mom would be proud of you." My brother's voice was soft, "and I have a feeling she loves you, (Y/N)."
"Yeah, and how do you figure that?" I look at him, my eyes filling with tears.
"Because shes our mother."

...Izuku's POV...

We all watched as she left, everyone in the room was silent. "She just spilled you guys the truth, if you still think we're the villains then maybe you should see that the lines are more blurred then you realize." Her brother walks by all of us and out the door. We were all silent. I think none of us knew what to think at this point.