Hoodie- Dreamnotfound

Anonymous

It's decided, Dream has his goals in mind to tell George how he feels.

Searching through his contact list, he desperately looked for a friend to phone. Names of all his closest friends were listed, but they passed him like a blur.

Approaching the G names, he reached George. His finger froze, hovering over his name.

It's not that he didn't have anyone to rant to, but nobody felt like the right person except him. This would be a problem he would come to George about, clearly, that's impossible.

Dream chuckled at the idea of phoning George about his questioning of sexuality. It sounded ridiculous to even think about it.

He headed over to his computer and opened up a search Reddit. He had kept an anonymous account to post whenever he felt like not spreading it to his entire fanbase.

Knowing he couldn't ask anyone he knew in real life about his situation, he figured that people who have dealt with this before could give him advice. The internet.

In a haze, he scrolled through multiple searches and threads. He went on incognito to search these up, even though nobody would check his history, he felt embarrassed.

Am I gay?

Do I like him?

Straight but have a crush on a guy?

Closer than friends?

He sighed in frustration, nothing was helping. The quiet voice in his head scolded at him, telling him that the fact that he was searching this up in the first place was a red flag in itself.

After spending long hours taking quizzes and tests of all sorts, they all resulted in signs pointing to yes. He even purposefully didn't take them truthfully just to avoid telling George.

It was evident, certain almost that he liked George.

As he continued, he read an interesting comment from an anonymous account.

To whichever love-struck soul needs this.

Tell them you like them, otherwise, you will regret it, (personal experience). If they don't like you back, life will move on. If they do, that happened thanks to you confessing to them. Life is short. Don't fill it with worry and regret. Go for it.

Everything happens for a reason.

His eyes lingered at the last sentence. Everything happens for a reason. If he didn't tell George now, he would be miserably filled with regret. He didn't want to live like this. There's a reason he likes George.

Control, that's all he ever wanted. Not being able to control his feelings for George was a new struggle for him to tackle.

But why was it so difficult? Why couldn't he just tell him?

The only thing that was stopping him... was him.

Firstly, he had to admit his feelings to himself. It seemed dumb, but it was apparently an important process according to a dumb article he found.

He stood up from his chair and began.

"I... Like--" He managed, but he couldn't do it.

Confused, he tried again, "I like him," but that wasn't specific enough. He needed to say his name.

It took a few tries, "I like George-- I... Like... George," he enunciated each word, the more he said it the clearer he sounded. It wasn't like the countless times he had said it live or in front of an audience.

He repeated it over and over until it sounded right, it started to have a natural feel to it. He sat back down, relief overwhelmed him. He was finally honest with himself, his head started to clear.

Those three words could change everything between them.

-

He hung up from the third call this week, deeply disappointed in himself. He tried so hard to tell George, but he simply couldn't. Every time he'd try to say the words, his throat would close up and his mouth would suddenly run dry,

The tension between them was excruciating, especially since the other night with the pictures they had sent back and forth. Dream wasn't the best at reading people, but even he knew George had to feel something.

It was obvious to anyone outside of their relationship that their friendship was more, but none of them acted upon it. After the incident with the pictures, Dream couldn't just throw it all away, he was done acting and putting on a show.

Unless one of them spoke up about it, would it always just continue on as a "possible" relationship that they will continue to deny forever? He was lacking certainty, which scared him a lot.

He needed to clear his schedule and make time to tell George.

The longer he waited, the more stressed he felt. Pacing back and forth between his bed and the door, more sleepless nights imagining George by his side, having to spend hours with George acting as if he didn't want to kiss him all the time, everything hurt.

He didn't hope for a lot of things, but he had hoped this would be the final time he had to do this.

Today had to be the day.

He was going to tell George how he felt.

Grabbing his headphones and sitting down in his chair. He prepared himself, trying not to be pessimistic about this. He convinced himself that there's no way that George didn't like him, I mean it was obvious, wasn't it?

He saw George's blue icon in the voice channel, sitting there all alone. His stomach twisted and turned as he clicked the join button.

The joining noise alarmed George. "Oh uh, hello! Who is that?"

"It's me, Dream." He made sure his voice was gentle, he knew George liked that.

He seemed concerned. "You're still up? Isn't it pretty late on your end?"

He had forgotten about time, the only thing that had been occupying his head was George. It was nearing 2 am, but he didn't feel an ounce of tiredness.

"I could say the same for you" Dream chuckled.

After light conversation topics, the call eventually fell silent. Nobody was talking, nothing was stopping Dream from saying it.

Tell him.

Tell him.

Tell him.

His face burned, this was the moment, this is where everything will change. With his heart pounded, he opened his mouth to speak.

Before he could even say George's name, an unfamiliar name joined the call.

994 words peolep

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