Outloved

11.

'This is so nice' I welcomed Mister Irfan's family to my place for dinner a few days later after I finished setting up my place. Even though the place was for a temporary stay, I still wanted it to look nice. I added small fairy lights and light fabric curtains by the window to let the light in. I also bought a few small paintings for the bare walls, and a separator, to divide the living and bedroom area. I dressed traditionally, a simple pink dress with blue and silver embroidery around the neck and sleeves. I missed wearing traditional clothes and today was the day for it. I told Ayat about what I was cooking and what I was going to wear, and she jokingly said it sounded like I was trying to impress my in-laws. Of course, she was kidding, but my mind was already too distracted to find anything hysterical about her comment.

'Oh, it smells so good' Nano noticed the aromatic scent coming from the kitchen when I finished cooking just a few moments before everyone arrived later in the evening, all except the infamous man himself. I made one specific dish for everyone that I thought they might like. I was looking forward to hosting them, after all, they looked after me when I arrived in Amsterdam, so I wanted to do a good job with the cooking. They were nice enough to get me a huge box of sweets.

'Gulab Jamun' I squealed in happiness when I opened the box and looked at the deliciousness. 

'I told Irfan to get a cake, but he came home with a box of this...but I am glad you like it,' Farah apologized, and my smile vanished when I heard he brought this. He must have remembered this from the wedding we went to...no, my mind reversed. This was random; he didn't get Gulab Jamun because he cared or anything. If he did, he would be here today. Where was he? Why wasn't he here? I wanted to ask but couldn't get myself to do it. What if they misunderstand my questions?

'What happened to your hand?' Abeer noticed a slight burn on the side of my finger when we all sat down.

'Just a slight burn...it's nothing,' I told him, smiling at how attentive he was.

'Did you put anything on it? Let's see' Ruby Aunty, who was sitting close to me, held my hand to see if I was okay.

'I am okay...I put the ointment on it...cooking full time is a new thing for me' I laughed.

'I will have Irfan drop food for you...I will pack it together, and he will bring it,' Nano offered right away. She was the sweetest. I missed spending time with her.

'Nano, it's a good practice. I like cooking... I just need to be a little careful,' I replied and excused myself to start bringing out the food.

'Irfan had a meeting, so he couldn't make it' Farah came with me to the kitchen to help me and to explain for her brother's absence. 

'That's fine...I'll pack some food for him...and all of you...I made plenty,' I replied quickly but noticed her lingering gaze on me from the side of my eyes.

'You promised you would visit us...Abeer misses playing with you,' Farah said a moment later as I heated the dishes in the microwave.

'I was swamped...I am finally doing some real work at my internship, and the project that I am working on is very time consuming and with setting up this place and cooking and cleaning during the weekend, I didn't have time...maybe you can bring Abeer here, and we can hang out here' I suggested. The truth was I was trying to limit my visits to Mister Irfan's house. Since our last conversation over the phone from the day he helped me move, I felt like something weird had happened between us. The long pauses and neither of us not knowing what to say to each other left me feeling very odd. I was anticipating his appearance today to see how things were between us...to see if we were okay but him choosing not to come here sent me an unsaid but clear message, he was avoiding me.