𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙙𝙚; 𝙙𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙤 𝙢𝙖𝙡𝙛𝙤𝙮

seventeen

Days went by and you could not look at Malfoy without having your heart throb with a heavy pain. Nothing could erase the feeling of the deep sorrow and disappointment in your chest, pulsating with every breath. And every time you think back to that exact moment, you could feel a flame ignite and explode into a wave of overwhelming emotions.

It didn't help that you thought of the situation nearly every hour of the day. At night, you could drown in your own tears while your thoughts slowly chip away the hours of sleep. And in the morning, you would find yourself blanking out in the middle of a lesson. Days felt longer than ever.

"Y/n! Y/n Clarke!" an orotund voice echoed in your head, snapping you back to reality.

You blink rapidly as your gradually regain consciousness, you clearly lapsed again.

"Hm?" you hummed, shifting your gaze to a girl with bushy brown hair.

"Clarke, you did it again." Hermione sighed, leaning back into her chair.

You glanced around you and remembered you were sitting in the library having a light discussion with Hermione until your vision blanked and everything deafened.

"I didn't do anything 'Mione, you're being ridiculous."

"Don't act like the entire library can't see you vacantly staring into a blank wall."

You sighed and shook your head, reaching for the nearest book and flipping the cover open.

In a sudden movement, the book in front of you shut aggressively with your hand inside. You gasped lightly, a little frightened. You look up to see a hostile Hermione staring at you with her nostrils flared and lips pursed.

"Do not ignore me, Clarke. What is it with you?" Hermione shout whispered, her hand still on the book cover.

"Ow? And there's nothing, I just haven't been sleeping the best that's all." you reply, your voice trailing off in the end.

"Is this about Malfoy?" she questions, her eyes full of curiosity.

You instantly dart your gaze elsewhere and completely disregarded her assumption, which was absolutely it, but you didn't want to admit it.

"Clarke, is it?" she asks again, even though the answer is practically waving in her face.

"Excuse me." you muttered, your eyes stinging with tears.

You pushed yourself out of your chair and racing to the bathroom, constantly wiping at your tears with the sleeve of your robe. Your chest began to tense and you could feel your entire body go numb. Your head aches as your body temperature knocked itself up a few degrees.

As you continued to the bathroom, tears blurring your vision, you knocked yourself into someone.

"I'm sorry." you mumbled as you pushed past them, keeping your head low to hide the tears.

"You're all good." a familiar low and calming voice responded.

You paused in your tracks and felt your entire body go cold. That voice reminded you of someone, memories resurfaced correlating with it. You couldn't hear any footsteps receding, it seems like they stopped as well.

Could it be-

"Draco?"

"Clarke?"

draco pov

"Clarke?" I utter, turning around to see her.

I didn't notice that her eyes were filled with tears or her long hair that cascaded effortlessly down her shoulders, but the one glistening ring that twisted itself around her soft fingers. The ring I gave to her as a promise to myself that I would never hurt her.

But here she stood before me, her face slick with tears and her eyes heavy with dark circles tracing beneath them. And every part of me wanted to apologize but I couldn't seem to say anything. My head filled with thoughts but my voice was blank.

We stood in silence for a few seconds before she turned around to continue down her path.

"Wait." I blurted.

She stopped again but didn't turn around.

I could feel her pain pouring out of her, the pain that I caused.

"Look, I'm- I'm-"

"Look what? I'm sorry?" She interrupted, spinning around to face me, her expression stripped of everything but anger.

"Because I know damn well that's not true. I know you so much so that those words don't even exist in your world. You are nothing besides an insensitive, lying piece of shit." She continued, taking a step closer to me.

I couldn't say anything, I couldn't move. All I could do was watch her break down in front of me and I wouldn't even do anything to stop it. Because she was right, I couldn't say those words.

"Do you realize that what you say affects other people?"

I stood there completely still. I know what I said to her and I didn't mean a bit of it. I was angry and frustrated, but nothing could change what I said.

"I fucking hate you." Her entire expression faded and her eyes began to well up in tears again.

Before I could do anything to stop myself, I was holding her in my arms and she was crying on my chest.

"I hate you, I hate you, I hate you." she mumbled into my robe as she pounded her fists into my chest.

I know.