━━━ 𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐘

𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨, 𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐞 three

Perhaps it was the hollow feeling in my chest slowly creeping to deeper depths of sadness that into being numb, or that my tears kept forming and spilling out of my eyes without my permission rather than coming to an end, or even maybe the not-so-subtle gossip that was going on about the big city boy who cheated on the small town girl, it was probably all of what which allowed me to give a name to this hurt; heartbreak. 

Well, a first heartbreak. Which made the feeling all the more foreign and painful. As if a dark shadow was cast over our memories turning them grey. 

I assumed this would be that moment when a mother talks to her daughter, telling the child about her first love, her first pain. I’d seen it in movies, but never thought much about it. It was only now when I wished I could have that conversation. I wished I could have someone tell me that I’ll find someone else, or It’ll all be okay in the end. But I didn’t.

I didn’t blame Joaquin for it, not one bit. He had too much going on on his own. In fact, the only time i could say I smiled, actually and honestly, this week when Joaquin told me that his parents would be moving away. You see, they were movie producers, and didn’t really have a very understanding relationship with their son. So I could see how them being away for months at a time would be good, until Joaquin could move out himself. 

But after that evening, things turned back to me alone in my room, lying on my bed listening to songs that I thought I could relate to yet none of them stood out to me. But then again, maybe it was because my mind was too preoccupied. Blocking out the thoughts of Inez’s smug remarks and all the ‘oohs’ and ‘she should’ve seen it coming’ were harder than I thought. 

I muffled the sound of my brothers and aunt below but putting on my headphones, listening to every cheating song I could find, letting the tears flow freely and trying to come to the conclusion that this was the end of a chapter in my life. 

I knew Louis, and was definitely not oblivious to his amazing acting. He was gonna be big someday, but it pained me knowing that I would soon be just a  small memory to him. 

A small town girl. His small town girl. But not anymore.