the first time

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It was the first time I see a gun, and the last time I see my parents.
It was the winter as i remember, in this cold days you can see a piece of bread as a steak.
the north is the coldes plece in world, had two  seasons the cold summer and the snowing winter.
To live in the north you need to be an  ant, work in the cold to survive the snow.
But you can’t work in the north and if you get one is not enough, the work not in up here it is down there in the warm south.
dad work in bakery in “bork” the country blow us, he travels with some neighbors on his green bike to the warm southern cities.
He goes on the daybreak and come back on before the night, with two basket of food last for 3 to 4 days bread from his bakery and  some fruits (half apple, half-impure, grapes…) rarely meat and chicken from the rich people garbage..
I love chicken. Always I go the fridge to steel it, but my mom catch me every time.
“come here boy”.
and pinch me on my shoulder my thigh any place she can reach.
“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”.
one pinch with her unruffled hand enough to leave violent bruise last two to three weeks. However, she always leave me eat what I take after I cry.
Back then every day, I listen to my dad stories about the warm cities how the buildings are High-rise made of hard dark stone, what the people wear there, the shops and the kind of food they eat, and anything.
I was so passionate to story that my father will tell me tonight, therefore I wait him on the front of the door. However, he late this time so I sat on chair next to the window looking through to the road.
From the years that we lived here, I can tell amount of food carried by the sound of the rusty green bike. Time passed, is the sunset.
“kiiiiit…kiiiit” .
“oh he comeback” that what I told mom that was worry “oh…” mom sigh.
I decided to hide on the fridge that was next the door to surprise dad, because mom did not allow me go out to meet him. So I wait.
*noknok dad knock the door and enter, I open fridge door to scare him “DAaa”
*BAM…
That sound who interrupt me was the sound of the gun in my dad hand indicates to mom, when I turn my eyes to mom her head was explode as crackers.
The warm blood cover dad face who seemed not in this world. My dad looked long at his wife…without any word dad put the gun in to his mouth and shot.
*BAM…
Me on the fridge I watch everything in slow motion. The loud voice of the bullet No one heard it or no one want to hear it.
In the middle steam bath of that blood, looking to my dead parents I was old enough to know that they are dead.
Not one teardrop from my eyes I don’t know why. I just felt DRY.
I picked up the gun from my dad hand. Then I lie down in the middle of the blood looking to the roof, just stretching there leg on leg, the gun on my chest, and my hands on my belly.
“There is blood on the root as well”
I hold the gun in the sky.
“The blood messed up your lighting silver”
Then I pet it inside my mouth.
*what I’m thinking about.
the answer simply was I’m not. The gun was cold and taste of the blood was like the rusty iron.
Then I pulled the trigger…BAM.
   It was dark, void like the void of the sleep without dream. Then I felt like my eyes closed so I opened them, to see my body or my corpse.
“Hmmm…from when we have mirror on the roof… ha…who speaks”.
The sound was from my back. Therefore, I looker to see the roof nearby.
“Ha…what??!”
Turn aging to my corpse, looking well.
“Corpse eyes are closed! However, I can see! What is happing?”
I can feel like I am sort of cloud or stream.
“Where is my body? Did I become a soul? This is what happen when you died?”
At that moment, I accepted the fact that I’m dead, it was hard to believe but it was the only thing that make sense.
Then I then I looked to the two dead body next to my corpse, I couldn’t  recognise there faces.
Starting to rise I went out of my house to see it from the top.
“So this is the warm house I used to live in”
Going to sky, my house become smaller more and more. Flying higher than the birds that I want to touch.
I wasn’t hungry or thirsty; I did not breathe or feel.
I was able to see the whole world, the glowing world, seemed quiet and warm.
Stopped to sit on a cloud. Get along with the stars. Meditate at the light of the earth how flashing, nothing can describe the view here.
Hours and hours in the dark blue sky. Thinking nothing, net mind.
The sun brightness and her light blind me, he goes inside my eyes directly. Unwilling I close them and turn to the left.
“I feel choking, I need to breathe”
*HAAAaaaaaa…Heh…heh… (Breathing hardly)
I open my eyes.
“A white roof?”
Is what in front of me, wasn’t my roof.
Looked around, it is sort of chamber and I am in bed maybe, I don’t know I could feel nothing probably I was anesthetic.
This all happen, before I slept suddenly.
“Hey you small cat, stealing the chicken again come over here”
“MISSION FAILED, plan B…RUN” *Naruto-run
I came out of the home, Then a big hand catch me up.
“Oh…catch you, why are you running?”
The dad look to the house door, there was the mom waiting for olala to come back.
“Hiiiii…the chicken again”
Dad put me down holding my hand whispering in my ear.
“Don’t worry I get more chicken”*jojo-vs-dio
He smiled, and then we went home.
Around a small worn-out table we sit.
“Time to eat” that is all I think about.
“Pat go get some chicken”
“Oh…”
“Do you forget? Hahaha…the basket is in front of the fridge”
I want quickly to the basket.
“Chicken aaaaa…”
I carried it to the table.
“Come on, open it”
I nodded yes, looking at it with longing and eagerness. I opened the basket to find all kinds of human organs fingers, hands, legs, intestines, hair and eyes. In middle of a whirlwind of blood extends to infinity, and I am see it from the top.
*DFDF DFDF……DDF DDF DDF
My heart forget a beat.
Then a slayed hand extend from the basket and grip my both hands.
“Aa………”
It was a desperate screaming attempt.
*BAM…BAM the sound for the silver gun.
I raised my head to find mom and dad standing looking to me with what left of their faces.
*ddf…ddf ddf ddf ddf my heart beat increased
“a…………………”
Almost voice come out of my mouth. Dad faced the gun at me, and star getting closer. I close my eyes for a second then opened them to find myself pulled in the basket middle of blood and fear. One more time I close my eyes and open them.
“It is so dark”

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⏰ Last updated: Jan 10, 2021 ⏰

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