Climax of Insanity

8 => h.s.

It's been about two weeks since Harry's asked me to be his girlfriend.

It's Saturday and I woke up really early due to my phone going off. I looked at it and wasn't surprised by the number of messages on it. They were all from Harry, he always blows my phone up when I don't answer him right away.

Harry: Good morning babe

Harry: Ryland?

Harry: Bitch, I know you ain't asleep

Harry: Are you really still sleeping? It's like lunch time

Harry: I was gonna take you to get some lunch but oh well.

Me: I'm up, I'm up

Harry: of course bc there was food involved.

Me: okay, I'm getting ready, be here in like 20 minutes?

I jumped out of bed to get ready. I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror and boy did I look horrible. Mornings aren't my thing. I had about 18 minutes to get ready now and I jumped in the shower. When I got out, I dried my hair and ran over it with a straightener. I pulled on some white high waisted shorts and A pink flowy top.

I hopped down the stairs and walked into the kitchen to find my dad sitting at the table. "Well, you're in a good mood today. Why? What has you like this?" He said, while I was fixing me a glass of water. "Oh dad. Dad, dad, dad," I stood beside him and kissed his cheek, "I'm going to lunch with Harry," I said with a smile, "Don't wait up."

Just as I walked out of the kitchen, the door opened, "Oh yeah cool, you don't have to knock," I said in a sarcastic tone. Harry just smiled at me and pulled me into a hug. "How are you this afternoon darling?" "I'm good! Where are we going to eat?" I guess all I was worried about was food.

When my mom died, that's what I turned to, food. I know it sounds pathetic but it was true. My mom was my whole world. I loved her with all of my heart and it tore me apart when she passed. She was such a good person, a wonderful wife, and an incredible mother. I had it bad when she died but I think my brother has it worse. He went into a deep depression that nobody could get him out of for awhile.

"Babe?" My thoughts were interrupted by Harry and then I realized that we were already in his car. "I've been talking to you for awhile," he said. "I'm sorry, I was thinking"

"About what?"

Harry knew my mom was dead, but I don't think I could possibly tell him how I felt about it. I would more than likely burst into tears and that's not always the best thing to do around people. "Nothing," I decided to say. Harry looked at me like he knew I was lying, "Ry, please don't do that."

"Do what?" I asked causally. "Don't lie to me." He replied. I couldn't say anything at the moment. I just didn't know what to say.

"So, where are we going," I asked. Harry sighed, knowing that I wasn't about to tell him anything. "How about papa johns? Pizza sound good?" He asked, smirking but not taking his eyes off the road. "Have I ever turned down pizza?" I said jokingly.

*****

"So, he was like 'oh no you didn't' and I was like 'boy, yes. I did'." Harry said, laughing at his own story. I forced a chuckle. I had so much on my mind. And plus his stories aren't really funny.

"Ryland, seriously, you gotta stop," I looked at him with a puzzled look, "I'm trying here okay? You keep staring into space and I don't know what's wrong. You have a wall built around you and it's so fucking hard to break down! I mean damn, here I am trying to help you get through whatever this is and you won't open up. This wall has to come down sometime"

I just stared at him. He was right. My wall had to come down. After my mom died, I spent so long building this wall, and now I have someone who possibly cares about me and I have to let them in.

"Wow, ok. I'm going to pay, then I guess we will leave." He said, lower then usual. I felt horrible. I felt like I owed him an explanation. I knew I did but I just couldn't bring myself to tell him anything.

*****

The ride to his house was silent. My dad had text me and said he was going out with some friends and Harry insisted I go home with him so I didn't have to be alone. We pulled up to his house and got out of the car.

"Mum, I'm home," Harry yelled from the door. No one answered. Harry took out his phone to call his mom and quickly realized his mom sent him a message saying she had to pick up his sister from the airport.

We walked into his living room to watch some movies.

"What do you wanna watch, love?" He asked. I just shrugged my shoulders. Harry turned around to the wall and punched it. "Ryland, I can't keep doing this! I can't keep pretending things are okay when you won't even talk to me!" He yelled, "I care about you! I really do. So fucking much Ry and how do you think it feels to sit back and watch the girl you love go through so much pain? It doesn't feel ni-" I cut him off, "wait, you love me...?"

"Yeah, that's not exactly how I planned on telling you but yes, I love you Ryland."

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MAJOR FEELS✋ oh and hawey get mad👶