Stop

chapter 4

It had been about two hours since we got here and he saw them. he saw my cuts while we were on a ride. "God damn it Aron! It's not your problem anyways, leave me the fuck alone!" I screamed, walking away as I fight the tears trying to fall. "No, Kyle it is my problem. You're my boyfriend. This is my problem. And you're happy so why do it anyways?! There's nothing wrong in your life!" Aron yelled resulting in a cringe. He doesn't even know. He doesn't know my dad hits me. He doesn't know the fucks at school bully me. He doesn't know I'm all alone. He doesn't know. "Let go, Aron," my voice is demanding.

 He locked his fingers around my wrist where my cuts from the day before are.  I pulled my hand away but his grip tightened and I cringed. "Please..." Pain and tears are evident in my voice.  "I just need to go home, Aron.." I whisper. He slowly let go and i was quick to check my wrist seeign one of the deeper cuts had reopened "F-fuck.." I reached in my bag and grabbed gauze wrappign it around my wrist securing it then looked at aron whispering "J-just because you dotn know what all goes on behind your back doesnt mean i d-dont have a valid reason!" He simply stared at me pissed off "Well if you think that you need to do it then maybe i shouldnt be with you!" before i could react his fist came in contact with my cheek. i simply flinched and stared straight ahead trying to collect my thoughts as he looked shocked by his own actions. "Kyle i am so sor-" i simply turned and started walking tears gathering in my eyes but none falling,not wanting to cry in front of him "KYLE! WAIT!" I sped up and started runnign down the sidewalk,my sneakers coming in contact with the ground and making a noise every step,my heart was beating,my chest hurt,and my cheek was throbbing,but all i could do was run. I heard aron runnign after me and i started to let tears roll down my cheeks

"KY STOP! WAIT! LET ME EXPLAIN!" I was slowing down as i started to run out of energy not being able to run much longer, my lungs feeling like they had been filled with glass. i slowly came to a jog and as fast as i could i ran into the park going to the kids area and climbing into the tunnel stopping to catch my breath for a moment hearing aron right behind me. 

"Kyle....let me explain....im sorry..." he was staring at me from outside the tunnel not daring to come inside knowing i would freak out if he had "N-no...i-i....ill be ok...im used to it...." i whispered regretting it once the words left my lips quickly i tried to recover it"i-i...n-no...d-dont...d-dont worry"  i visibly paled as he looked upset "what do you mean your used to it? who hits you?" i sniffed and went out the otherside of the tunnel starting to walk home hearing aron try to follow "ky? answer me baby...please" i turned aroudn quickly and started to shake while sobbing "DONT BABE ME! DOTN F-FUCKING SAY IT AGAIN! I-IM NOT KY! IM KYLE! JUST KYLE! YOU DONT DESERVE TO CALL ME KY! YOU B-BROKE ME! HIT ME! HURT ME! JSUT LIKE MY DAD! MY BROTHER! HELL EVEN MY FRIENDS! I-I THOUGHT YOU WERE DIFFERENT! YOUR JUST LIEK ALL OF THEM! I THOUGHT I HAD FOUND SOMEONE WHO W-WOULDNT HURT ME ANYMORE! WHO WOULDNT MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I SHOULD JUST FUCKING KILL MYSELF ALREADY! YOU MAKE ME FEEL SO DAMN SMALL! LIKE A FUCKING KID! JUST LIEK THEM! YOU MADE ME FEL LOVED! BUT YOU HAD TO RUIN IT DIDNT YOU! YOU JUST HAD TO HIT ME! YOU JUST HAD TO MAKE ME WANT TO DIE NOW DIDNT YOU!ITS PROBALY WHAT YOU WANT NOW ISNT IT! WELL I GUESS YOU'LL GET YOUR WISH! FUCK OFF ARON!" I screamed and then ran as fast as i could before tryign to flag a cab 

when i finally did i quickly got in and told him to go to the san francisco bridge. when we arrived it was overrun with traffic.i got out after handign him some money and ran to the middle of the bridge then wint to the left side climbing to the upper platform of the side and walking to the edge just a few inches before a huge drop to water.

I took a deep breath as I heard people yelling and trying to get me down but all I could do is whisper over and over "Goodbye cruel world, goodbye. Goodbye goodbye." Then I heard a yell. A specific yell that said a specific name. "Kenny." Only one person would know that name. Kasidy. She was here and about to watch me jump. Fuck. 

I faulted and turned, looking directly into her bright tear filled eyes. I was hurting her. I dropped to the ground on the side of the bridge. I felt a pair of arms slide around me and heard a heartbeat as Kasidy pulled me against her chest, her heart beating rapidly. I felt her ribcage press against me- she thinks I don't notice how little she eats but I know she's anorexic. I feel water splash against my hair and knew she was crying. "Baby, why?" She whispered.