now or never (LUKE PATTERSON)

7

Lydia sat with her mom at the dinner table. It was Saturday night and luckily she didn't have a late night shift. Though the mood always felt different, it was still nice to have her mom back at home.

"So, how was your week? I haven't really been here to really ask that in a while." Her mom started a conversation. Lydia sighed, but it was not because she didn't want to talk to her mom. But it was just because the topic bothered her. So much had happened, but did she want to explain it all? Not really.

"Riley and Justin are acting weird." Lydia blurted. Thought she didn't want to talk about it, she wanted to get it off her chest.

"What do you mean?" Her mom asked and Lydia drank her water. Deeply sighing as she continued to talk. "Well for starters, Riley now hangs with the girls who dye their hair blonde and swears it's their natural color as if they didn't have brown hair in elementary school. Secondly, Justin is just more distant than before." Lydia said and her mom nodded.

She knew Justin got distant once he stopped coming over. It was like a daily thing for her to come home to see Justin was also there accompanying her daughter. "Some things may get better, some may get very worse, and I'm sorry that this is happening to you, I feel bad for being at work all the time. But if you ever need me, just call." Her mom said and the girl just nodded. "I'm friends with the band now. So that's a good thing." She added, watching as her mom's eyes widened. "New friends?" Her mom asked proudly.

"Yeah, they're sweet too!" Lydia stated. "That's good to hear." Her mom said and she nodded. "Anything happening at work?" Lydia asked "Not really, Mason's leaving though." She spoke as if it meant nothing but Lydia knew it did. "You've been waiting for this moment for how long?" Lydia asked making her mom laugh. "For the last five years!" She said and Lydia's eyes widened. "It's been that long?" Lydia asked and her mom nodded. And for the rest of dinner, it was all small talk.

After dinner Lydia went up to room, laid on her bed and stared at her ceiling. She thought about how Justin and Riley didn't want to sit with her today, how she didn't want to do math, how Luke made her heart flutter today. Her mind wandered millions of places at once.

The thing that roamed her mind the most was how she only knew Luke for two days and today he made her heart flutter. It was just his green/blue eyes and nice smile that made her feel some type of way. Everything about Luke was just perfect and she hated to admit it.

He was sweet, and so were the others. Bobby was growing on her and she felt comfortable around them. Now she suddenly wished to be at school just to be in their presence. She wanted to get to know the boys, and spend time with them. Lydia wanted to be involved with them. But she was too scared to invade their friend group. She felt like she was going to get in the way of everything.

The girl was already having problems with her friends so why try making more problems?

Lydia only hoped for the best when it came to her new friendship with the boys. But she didn't want her own friendship with Justin and Riley to fall out. Justin and Lydia were friends since they were young, Riley didn't come around until a little bit later. But they were still so close. And just to watch her friendship collapse so slowly and painfully made the girl sad.

Maybe I'm not good enough, maybe I'm still stuck in our old kiddy world. Changes happen and I'm too afraid to let go. Am I the only one who still wants what we had?

She thought to herself. Trying to get a better understanding.

She felt like that they were ready to grow up with the older kids, but she didn't wanna rush anything. She wanted to be who she was and not try to fit in with people who weren't their true self. She didn't get why her best friends wanted to be involved with them. But she couldn't stop them for doing what they want.

She just wanted everything to be okay, for her dad to be back home, for her friends to stay close to her, for her to gain more friends than before. But everything was just the opposite. The only good thing was that she had Luke, Alex, Reggie, and Bobby now.

edited