December 10, 2020

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                It had all started as if it was just a normal day. The voices in my head were getting louder, telling me all these different ways to just end my life. I tried to fight it but soon enough it would've gotten to strong.

                As I was getting ready for school i was thinking about the things that had happened the other night. It was no doubt a horrible night. I was on call with the suicide hotline, which it didn't seem like they actually listened to me, I had blood slowly coming down my arm as i was sitting in my room crying. I looked back at my arm thinking to myself "Why should it have to be this way?" as I sat looking n the mirror, looking as if getting help was hopeless, I thought back to myself "Why did i even do this? Why can't the things i have be enough for me." Some things from the past night were a little blurry. I remember overdosing n a suicide attempt, taking over 20 pills, almost a whole bottle, but when I ask myself why, why did i do this? nothing came to mind.

               I walked into school knowing that they were going to call me into the office, and they did. "Hey Shyanne, I got your email. What did you need to talk to me about?" In my head all i could say was "Damnit I forgot I sent her an email. Should I tell her?" I sat there a put on that wonderful fake smile everyone just loved to see and said "Oh right. About that..."

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