𝐏𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓 ( 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧 )

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

*UNEDITED*

"That's the thing about perfection. Everyone has their own idea of it. And  I never used to try to be perfect, but at one point in my life I guess I did. I wanted to be the perfect daughter, or the perfect sister, or girlfriend." Emberly explains to everyone in the group who was watching allowing her to share what she felt as she sits on the couch talking. 

It's been three weeks since Emberly checked herself into rehab. 25 days of becoming a better person.

She would be lying if she said this wasn't the best thing to do. Because it was.

Her mental health wasn't good, and she saw that and she wanted to do something about. She would be released in a few days.

Because she wasn't on drugs or nothing like that her program wasn't long. You only stay how long your therapist think you should stay. And her therapist saw she was making good progress and would be released soon. 

"Why the need to be perfect?" Emberly looks at the girl to her left, that was Destiny who had asked the question. 

"Everyone assumed I was, so I just convinced myself it was true and that's who I needed to be. And I was just trying to help other people in my life instead of dealing with my own problems. The worst about perfection, is disappointing yourself 'cause you're the one person you can't escape. And when I realized I wasn't perfect, I just wanted to give up everything, including wanting to take my own life." Emberly explains. 

"Fear of letting people down?"

"Fear of not being good enough for someone." Emberly says.

"Ok. What else?" 

"What do you mean, what else?" Emberly asks frowning slightly confused by what she meant. 

"Look, that's the beauty of peer group. That's no doctors. It's just us. Share something you've never shared before. It'll help with what's weighing you down." Destiny tells her. 

"I, um, I don't think the people in my life love me enough to stay and I'm afraid I'll never be good enough for them." Emberly starts, "My Dad died from an overdose, what it an accident? Or did my Dad just give up on himself or give up on me and his family? Was I not worth living for? Or even my sister or brother. I have friends and family who love me and yet I was ready to end my life and leave it all behind. I just don't think I deserve all the good things in my life." Emberly explains. 

After she was one done explaining, she looked around shyly, playing with her hands.

She would have never told anybody that. And yet she just spilled her deep insecurities to a bunch of strangers. She talked to them some of them before but she wasn't close- close with any of them, so it was surprising that she had just told them that.

"Thanks for trusting us with something so personal, Emberly.  Major growth moment." Destiny says as she snaps her fingers everyone in the room doing the same.

It was their way of saying how proud they were that you had finally opened up. 

***

"Well, I don't want to bore you with all the updates on everyone's lives on the outside." Olivia says to Emberly as the two walk around the outside of area of the rebab center.

Last week Everly and Liam had came and visit her, this week Olivia had came, filling her in about everyone's life.

Everly was doing great and she finally had the guts to tell their that she was pregnant. They took the news very well according to Olivia.