No Clowns in the Woods

Chapter 4: We're Not in Kansas Anymore

“What the hell is that thing?” I heard Nick whisper from behind me. The eyes were staring directly at us.

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god!” Sarah chanted, “What are we gonna do?” I could hear the tremble in her voice, but I couldn’t bear to look away from the eyes long enough to check on her. Then, the eyes seemed to shift and fold together, almost like a.. pair of wings oh my god.

“I swear to god if that’s a giant bug I’m gonna riot.” I said, slowly moving closer to the eyes. Once I got close enough I was able to see that the 'eyes' were surrounded but what I thought was just the nearby foliage. Foluage that would move with the 'eyes', “Jesus that thing's huge.”

“It’s actually a bug oh my god.” Sarah said, taking a couple a steps towards it.

“Be careful Sarah! Considering how big it is it could still hurt you!” Nick said, going after her.

“What even is it? And why is it so big??”

“I mean, this is supposed to be one of the last old world forests?” I propose, still staring that the wings. “A lot of them got chopped down to make room for towns and stuff, but some of the land got bought out by some old white guys that just made a couple of houses and left the rest of it untouched. "

“Wild” Suddenly, the bug started to flap its wings and flew directly at us. We ducked to avoid it as it flew past us and back out to find another spot to perch.

“That was the scariest thing that ever happened to me and I’ve had to make a doctor’s appointment by myself.” Sarah once again hits Nick, although he kinda deserved it this time. He shoots her a dirty look before continuing, "Welp I think that’s enough excitement for right now, maybe we should get going again.”

“Yeah I think that’s fair. Which way were we going?” I asked, looking around the clearing.

“I think that considering the size of the thing,” Nick pointed after the bug, “We should probably be going the opposite way that we were heading before.”

“Right, but which way was that?” We all paused, looking around into the forest. “Goddammit did nobody think to make a marker of which way we were going?”

“Okay but to be fair, you didn’t think of that either!” Nick groaned, turning once again to look around the forest. “I guess we’re going to have to pick a way and hope it’s right then.”

“I choose this way!” Sarah exclaimed, pointing out into the forest.

“I mean it’s the best we’ve got so far.” I said. We began to walk in that direction when we heard a roar coming from our left. “All in favour of going in the opposite direction of whatever that was say aye.”

“Aye,” “aye”. So instead of the direction we were walking in before, we turned right and walked that way instead. The leaves under our feet crunched as the brush seemed to thin out a little. The plants growing farther apart from each other while the canopy grew thicker and thicker above us. Every now and again, we would hear a growl or some such coming from far off. Whatever it was, we didn’t want to be anywhere near it. Eventually the quiet became unbearable, suffocating and I just had to break it.

“So Sarah.”

“Yeah Max?”

“What do you wanna be when you grow up?” Sarah paused and slowly turned to look at me.

“… Are you fucking serious?” Nick started to crack up from behind us.

“What, don’t like that one? I have others.”

“Max please don’t”

“How’s school going? Anyone giving you any grief? Anybody pretty catch your eye? What classes are you taking? What’s your thoughts on the state of the world? Are your teachers nice? You know, all completely normal, casual questions.”

“Wait what was that last one?”

“Are your teachers nice? C’mon Sarah, keep up, you’re only like twelve it is way too early for you to have problems with your hearing.”

“Okay first of all Gramps, I am sixteen, and you know that because you planned my birthday party for it, second of all I didn’t realise you were getting so old that you can’t even relate to the youth anymore."

“Oh I’m sorry, are your eyes going since you’re so obviously old now. I’m only nineteen.”

“Whoops, my mistake. It must’ve been all the grey hairs you have that made me think you were an old geezer.”

“Oh bugger off, that’s a birthmark and you know it.”

“I don’t know dude,” Nick chimed in, “I think it’s gotten bigger.”

“Thank you Nick,” Sarah said, “See Max, I’m just looking out for you.”

“Oh yeah, thanks Nick, I can really see who my friends are. Maybe I’ll go back and see what that giant moth’s opinion on the topic, huh?”

“You really think that thing was just a moth?” Sarah asked me.

“Well yeah what else would it be?”

“I don’t know, any other type of bug? What makes you think it’s a moth?”

“First of all, it was brown.”

“Okay, moths also come in a bunch of fancy colours. But okay, let’s say that that makes it a moth. Why not a butterfly?”

“It was holding it’s wings horizontal to it’s body instead of vertical. It also had the right wing shape that would make it a moth. Why, would it being a butterfly instead make you less scared of the thing?”

“What? Of course it would. Have you ever seen someone scared of a butterfly?”

“No, but have you ever seen a giant butterfly? I’m sure if they were everywhere, then more people will be scared of butterflies.”

“Well I mean-“

“Not that this conversation isn’t absolutely fascinating,” Nick cut us off, “But I’m pretty sure that’s another clearing in front of us and I would like a drink of water and to check my phone thanks.”

“Sure, what could go wrong.” Sarah said, because she has a death wish.

“Sarah if I die in this forest because you keep saying that, I’m coming back and haunting your ass.”

“You’re welcome to try Gramps.”