{Ayla POV}
Months has passed, and I had started to become close friends with Mor and Cass, but I hadn't spoken to Az since that morning.
We hadn't said much to each other that day, but it felt like we had screamed and shouted at each other, and every time I try to speak to him he says he's to busy and walks away.
I had also been moved to the town house because Mor had complained she was getting lonely since Freya and Rhy were always together and so was Amren and varian.
Every morning I would sit on the roof while Cass trained Feyre, I hadn't gotten in the ring yet, I didn't want to, when I lost my wings it was like I lost that part of me that wanted to fight.
" when are you going to let me train you?" Cass's voice has me looking up from my book, " I don't need training."
I say going back to my book, " what do you mean you don't need training?"
Cass asked with a confused look.
" i don't need to train, because I don't need to fight." I snapped back,
"You might not need to fight now but you always need to know how to defend yourself." He pushed.
I slammed my book shut and stud up, "I'm going to find Az." At that I turned my back on a frowning Cassian, and walked away.
************
I walk down the stairs, from the roof, rubbing at the rash on my back that just seems to be getting worse.
I find Mor sitting on the couch, " do you know where Az is?" She looks up,
" I think he's on the balcony."she nods her head towards where she was talking about, I smile my thanks and walk over to the balcony, to find Az leaning against the railing.
" can we talk?" I say in away of greeting, " sure." He answers.
I close the to doors behind me, so we can have a bit more privacy.
" so what did you want to talk about?"
" oh cut the bullshit Az, you know what I want to talk about," he just gave me a look to say that he doesn't. I sigh and carry on, " come on Az, we haven't seen each other in over a hundred years and you act like you've got nothing to say. Your shutting me out again, remember we promised we wouldn't do that. I'm not going stand here and tell you that 'i'm hear for you' or ' if you ever need to talk you know where I am' because I know you already know that, but you've got to stop shutting me out and actually fucking talk to me."
I'm on the edge of shouting now, I can feel the rash on my back burning, it feels like something is trying to escape my skin.
Seeing that Az wasn't going to answer, I just shake my head and walk away.
I need to get out of here, the pain in my back is spreading and is becoming more agonising.
I walk back into the living room, Mor was still sitting on the coach, the pain makes me stumble into the wall,
" are you alright?" Mor is at my side steadying me, " yeah I'm fine, I just need to get out of here." I head for the door and winnow.
*******************
I land on snow, I had winnowed to my favourite spot in Velaris, it looked over the city and is surrounded by tall pine trees so I will be sheltered.
I scream and fall to my knees, the pain in my back is making me see black spots in my vision, I stand up, I've got to move, I have to move through this pain. I stubble towards a tree, I put my fist through it, the pain isn't as bad but it still has me roaring out loud. I pull my hand away from the splintered tree, I drag myself towards the pond in the middle of the trees, I hear branches breaking behind me as the tree topples over.
I sink to my knees by the pond and slide my hands into the freezing cold water, to wash away the blood from my split knuckles.
Pain is still raging in my body, I stand up but I soon double over as the most agonising pain I've ever felt.
I fall to my knees again, scream as the skin on my back finally split, my scream echoes through the trees, my back feels heavy but I don't have much time to think about it as I black out.
