Immediately Forgettable

Chapter 9

Several of King's holdings were grouped under the banner of The King Consortium. It was the only one of his companies that bared anything resembling his name. The website was scarce, however, offering only links to the other company sites and minimal contact information that included the Kansas address, a general phone number, and a generic email form.

I attempted to find a person by navigating through the electronic voice mail system, but all roads led to a main voice mailbox where someone would get back to me "as soon as possible." This rarely ended well, but I left a message anyway. I also filled out the email form and hit the send button, which joined my voicemail in probable corporate limbo.

The reporter-side of me settled down to wait for a day or two to see if anyone would call or email me back, but the CIA-side of me decided to check in with my boss and see if they were investigating King or his companies for any reason at all. I put a call into Sloane -- going directly to his cell phone so I wouldn't get stalled by his secretary. It unsurprisingly went directly to voice mail, so I left a detailed message about my King investigation, and told him to please contact me if the CIA was looking into him.

Now both the reporter and CIA sides of me waited for someone to call me back. Naturally, no one did.

Stage 2: It was clear from the lack of available information that the King Consortium was not big on publicity, but they were big on making money through sales. And salespeople are always interested in good, free publicity, and they can be great allies in getting through to corporate. Needing to use the pull and recognition of Farming Technology Monthly, I chose one of his agriculture-related companies — AgriTech, which specialized in automation systems for farms. I remembered seeing an advertisement or two in the magazine before, so it seemed the perfect target.

Within two presses of an automated answering system, I got passed through to a real salesperson, who was out to lunch. Jake Stone had a confident, strong tone to his voice, and I immediately wanted to be like him. I was sure he was handsome, impeccably dressed, and could handle himself well in any situation. I left a message, carefully enunciating the full title of Farming Technology Monthly. He called me back within a half hour, and was delighted to hear of my interest, saying it better in his guy's guy slang of "awesome." He knew no one in corporate communications, but not to worry: he'd dig in and get me someone to talk to. His tone made me confident that he'd carry through.

And he did. Within two days he had the name of someone in corporate who was expecting my call and would help me. Her name was Jennifer Holt, and she, Stone assured me, could get me everything I needed to know about the King Consortium. And, with a quick "looking forward to seeing the story," he ditched my call to find one with a paying customer.

As soon as I heard the name "Jennifer Holt," I started picturing her as a beautiful young publicist in well-tailored business suits that included jackets and tasteful skirts cut just at knee level. This isn't much of a stretch, as many companies hire beautiful, capable women to represent them to the world and press. I picture them this way, and develop good relationships with them through phone calls and emails. I meet them with high expectations that all my previous legwork would be enough to make them remember me, but it never does. Still, I hope for some Beauty & the Beast transformation when I meet the right girl.

Maybe Jennifer Holt was my Belle. Or maybe she was just another in a line of beautiful publicists who would forget about me the second she turned away. Or maybe she wasn't attractive, but if she had a good memory, I wouldn't care. It's not a good idea to be forgettable and choosy.

So I called with high expectations and was not disappointed by the voice on the other end of the line. She was pleasant, and laughed at my lame little jokes. Yep — that's all it takes. I was in love.