YOUTH & WHISKEY

I'm Leaving For Good

Andy was gone, when I awoke. Dampening my mood, so I decided to go find him. I walked into the kitchen. Ashley was the only one there, and he stood up. It was just us...AWKWARD. "Babe, I am so-" "Save it Purdy, and don't call me babe." I hissed. He grabbed my arm.,"Let go." I yelled. "Aria, please hear me out." He whispered. "No. Now let the fuck go." I screamed. Ashley let go, and punched his hand in the wall, missing me by little, and leaving a dent in the wall. I stared in shock. "Oh my gosh, what is wrong with you?" I frowned, stepping back. He stared at me, I ran outside. ASHLEY almost hit me. I saw Andy and grabbed him, tears spilling from my face. "Baby, what's wrong?" Andy says, hugging me. I told him, and he kept calm. Andy said "Do not tell Jake. He would KILL him." I nodded, wiping the tears off my face, and we went inside the bus. I was keeping a distance from Ashley. I had to walk passed him to grab a lighter, then I stopped, frozen. There were cuts on his wrists, jagged movements, he's cutting... I walked over to his bunk, ignoring his protests, and found a pocket knife, with dried drops of blood. I snatched it and walked over to Ashley ''The fuck is this?" I screamed. He tried to snatch it, but missed, and I ran outside, chunked it as far away as I could. He grabbed me, and shoved me against the bus. I let out a squike, waiting for him to hit me. But all he did was storm off.

I sat down, and told Jinxx, Jake, CC Sammi and Andy, when they came back. "Ashley's cutting himself." I stated, as a few tears fell down my cheek. Andy wipped them away, wrapping his arms around me. "Why?" CC asked, pretending not to know. I started crying, and replied "We all know why! Because of me." ''His fault he broke your heart." Sammi stated, trying not to sound worried. I nodded, and Andy hugged me, kissing my tears away. "I was thinking, after tour I might be leaving for awhile...forever." I sighed. Andy shook his head. "A, you can't, please." Andy whispered. I shook my head, it hurts me even to look at him now.

I told Andy, CC, Jinxx, Sammi, and Jake left to find Ashley. I didn't want to find him, I needed to clear my head. Then Ashley walked onto the bus, dead drunk, he smirked at me, then stumbled over to me. "Hey babe," He slurred. I looked disgusted, backing up.He grabbed my arm. "Let go!" I screamed, he laughed, because he knew I wasn't as strong as him. Ashley dragged me and threw me in the bedroom. I tried to get up, and be forced me down, as he kissed me, he tasted of liqure. I gaged, and shoved him against the bed, with the rest of my strength. I collected my junk, and sat down to write a note. I cried as I wrote. It kills me to do it, but I did, here it is:

Dear Jakerz, Andy, CC, Jinxxerz, and Sammi Doll,

I can't wait till the end, so I am leaving now. Ashley is passed out in the back room. I can't bare to not hurt when I am around him. I will miss you, and don't find me, I'll find you. I know it must hurt you to do this, but I can't do it any longer.

To Jakerz: I love hanging with you, I missed my big bro, but I need to leave, I love you. I had fun while it lasted it.

To Andy: I love you, but I am not good for you, my past is too rough, please forgive me. I can't be hurt again, even though I know you wouldn't.

To CC: You are my best guy friend ever, We will always be friends, I love you so much.

To Jinxxerz: You are my bestest guy friend! I love you to death, and I will see you again.

To Sammi Doll: Girl, you are an amazing friend. I love you, and see you soon...

To Ashley: You hurt me, in a way I can't heal. Please forget about me. Hate me. Good bye Ashley Purdy.

LOVE, ARIA PITTS

I ran out of the bus, and started walking. It was dark, and I was all alone. Various buses scattered around. A guy came out, smoking a ciggrette. He must've saw me crying, because he walked over to me. "Hey." He said, he seems friendly. I smiled, as best as I could. "C'mon. I'm not taking no as an answer!'' He laughed, walking me inside the bus. I noticed the logo said SLEEPING WITH SIRENS. "I'm Kellin, that is Gabe, Jack, Justin and Jesse. You are?" "Aria." I said, not adding my last name. They nodded, I like them already."Where are you going?" I asked. "Home." Kellin said. "You wanna come?" Gabe asked, winking at me. I blushed, "Only if it's ok with you guys." "YES!" Justin laughed, grabbing my ciggrettes. "These are now mine." I laughed, and sat down. My phone kept buzzing and I saw 10 missed calls, 2 new messages, and 5 texts. I deciced to check him, then change my number, so they won't find me.

My texts were:

JAKE: ARIA GET YOUR ASS HOME

JINXX: COME HOME, YOU'RE BROTHER IS FREAKING OUT

SAMMI: ARIA! PLEASE COME HOME, PLEASE!

CC: DUDE. WTF? GET YOUR ASS HOME. NOW

ANDY: I UNDERSTAND. I'M NOT MAD, BUT I AM HURT. I LOVE YOU. FIND ME WHEN YOU'RE READY TO COME HOME.

I deleted all of them. I can't stand hurting them.

My voicemessages were.

"Damnit Aria, pick the fucking phone up. NOW." "You are crazy to think you can leave! CC wants Aria!" I deleted those too. Finally I blocked everyones number. But I kept them in my address, just in case. SWS gave me their numbers, I smiled. They gave me a bunk, and me felt at home. That night I cried, and fell asleep. I was so angry, hurt, sad, so many feelings mixed up. Just UGHH! I want to scream, I mean how can I fix the ones I love, without being hurt? This time I'm being selfish. Instead of everyone else.

We traveled to Florida. I was like one of the boys, chilling like them, drinking like them, and smoking like them. Gabe and I are kind of dating. But this time, I'm being careful. The boys, and I bought a house, and I finally got my own room. They even let me design it, so I painted my room a perrywinkle, taped BVB posters on the walls, I set up my room. I will not forget them, even if they forgot me. I started to play Awake and Alive by Skillet, and sang along. Jesse came up behind me, "Im guessing youra Skillet fan." I smiled. "Yep, music's my escape." "Cool, so you like your room?" Jessie smiles."Yeah! It's got alot of charactor!" He laughed, and picked me. "Let me go!" I laughed. He carried me to the backyard. "She's here, Gabe." "Ok, gimme her." He laughed. I was handed to Gabe, and I screamed "Kellin!!!" Kellin came out. "Dude, I get to throw her in the pool." Kellin stated, then bam I hit the pool. Gabe had threw me in the pool, just like....never mind. I will not remember those memories.

I came up, laughing, and everyone was swimming in the pool. We were laughing, I threw off my shirt, and shorts. I was in my pink bra and underwear. Why the fuck not? Make new memories. Justin yelled "THIS IS HOW TO FUCKING PARTY!" Everyone stripped down into their underwear, except me. I laughed and we started drinking. "So sexy what had happen was?" Jesse asked, "Well I am Jake Pitt's little sister from Black Veil Brides. I went out with Ashley Purdy he cheated and we broke up. I ran away, and found you." I said, telling the whole story. Gabe nodded, and he grabbed me. He looked at my lips then at my eyes, we started kissing. Gabe picks me up, and we go into his bedroom, where I then pass out. I woke up, in Gabe's bed, we didn't have sex, THANK GOD. He frowned and said "Ummm, ok then. Well we didn't have sex. But ummm cool. Bye." Gabe said, blushing as he left the room. I started getting dress, then decieded to check my twitter, when I got an update on twitter. I started crying, Jake posted "Aria I know youre reading this, please come home. Call me."