But Baby 2 (Brad Simpson Fanfic)

chapter 18

A/N; Lol i said i might be bad at updating and now i'm here updating oh
im so cold
and hungry
someone come cuddle pls

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Zoe's POV;

"Come on Zo" i hear Brad whisper from behind me, his arms catching me into a warm embrace. I take one last look around the girls bedroom, admiring the sun that was glowing through the window, before unwrapping Brad's arms from around me, and silently drifting out of the room. I glance at myself in the mirror of the hallway, my black dress making my skin look paler than ever. 
Once today was over, we could move on from the tourture that life had been. I knew that once we had buried our sweet baby girls, they would be safe, and so would we. 

I pick Thomas up, out of his baby rocker, and cradle him close. Neither him or Ellie were coming with us today, I couldn't cope with them being upset or confused. We had arranged for a babysitter to come, but i didn't really like the idea of leaving them with a stranger, but this was our last chance to be with the girls, and we had to grasp it with both hands. 
I could hear Ellie upstairs, her giggling bellowing around the house, Brad must have been cracking some awful jokes. I kissed Thomas' head, his return was a gummy smile, which helped stop the ache in my chest. His small fingers wrapped around my hand, squeezing it slightly, his new found trick pleasing him. I smile back at him, admiring the numerous shades of brown in his eyes. 

"Come on Zoe, James is here" Bradley says, holding his hand out to me. I give one last smile at the babysitter, as she held Thomas on her hip, before following Brad out of the house and towards James' car. I swallow, as Brad squeezes my hand, giving me a reassuring glance. 

//.//.//.//.//.//.//.//.

I hold back the tears, when I enter the church. Brad wraps him arm around my shoulder, pulling me close to him. I can feel his heart beating out of his chest, as he kisses the top of  my head. My eyes swivel around, taking a note of everyone who was here, family and friends; wanting to give a last goodbye to Scarlett and Cleo. We stumble towards to front, taking a seat, just feet away from out babies. I so desperately want to run towards them, and never let go. But I know, that this is their day, the last time for them to be remembered, and loved. 
Slowly the room falls silent, as the priest takes his stance at the front,

"We are gathered here to say farewell to Cleo Emily Simpson, and Scarlett Millie Simpson,  and to commit them into the hands of God" 

The rest of the funeral continues, and I am pretty much oblivious to the on goings, until we are asked to speak. This was the point I was dreading. I glance at Brad, who smiles at me, tears brimming. I take a breath, and stand up. I can feel everyones eyes on me, as I shuffle towards to stand.

"I just want to thank everyone for being here" I mumble "I never thought I'd have to say goodbye to my little girls, I never thought I'd have to let them go. Knowing they're together helps, my sweet little angels are together, and one day, we can all be together, but for now, we have to be apart. I'm sorry I let you get hurt, and I'm so sorry that I was a lousey Mum. I know that i made alot of mistakes, and I know its a bit late to be saying sorry, but I am.
It hurts, knowing you'll never have your first boyfriend, never get married or have your own children, but I'm so glad that I got to give you the time you had, and that you experinced everything I could let you at such a young age.I'll always miss you two" i choke, letting the tears finally fall. I look towards Brad, who was now being cradled by him Mum, His face hidden in her arms. I glance towards my own Mum, who was sat, giving me a proud smile, while the tears fell like a waterfall from her eyes. 

I led my numb body back to my seat, while a few of Brads family give a speach, but yet again, I was too oblivious to the world to realise what was happening. Brad refused to give a speach, when we were talking about it. That did hurt, but I know Brad would struggle, he was struggling on a day to day basis, without needing to speak about his daughters. 

//.//.//.//.//.//.//.//.//.//.//

The wind whipped around us, as we watched the two pale pink coffins getting laid into the ground, next to each other. Brad had his arms wrapped around me, his tears landing onto my shoulder. 
"In the Name of God, the merciful Father, we commit the bodies of Cleo Emily and Scarlett Millie to the peace of the grave" The priest lets three hand-fulls of earth fall onto the coffin "From dust you came, to dust you shall return. Jesus Christ, our Saviour, shall raise you up on the last day Lord God, our Father in heaven, Lord God, the Son, and Saviour of the world, Lord God, the Holy Spirit, have mercy on us. At the moment of death, and on the last day, save us, merciful and gracious Lord God."
One by one, people let handfulls of pink and white petals fall ontop of their final resting place, and slowly they all drift away, along with the priest. I worm my way out of Brad, and sit crossed legs next to the hole, where their coffins lay. I sprinkle petals ontop, watching the wind make them dance around. Tears fall onto my cheeks, as Bradley lets his handful of flowers go. He sits down next to me, placing his suit blazer ontop of my shoulders. I kisses my head, and takes my hand into his. 
"I love you Zoe" 
"I love you too"
"We can do this, I promise Zoe, We can beat this and we can be stronger than ever" 
"Do you think Thomas realises? Do you think he knows they're gone?" 
"Maybe, but he is still happy, and I promise he's fine Zozo, you don't need to worry about that, him and Ellie are perfect, like you" I give him a weak smile, looking into his eyes. He leans in, and kisses me softly, his hand not leaving my cheek. "Come on, lets go home, get some rest" 

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A/N IM CRYING WHAT SORRY GOD I WANTED THIS TO BE REALLY LONG BUT ITS NOT AND IM SORRY 

Ily