First & Last [RenMin] ✔

10

He's in the kitchen making coffee when the bedroom door creaks open. Instinctively, he grabs another cup out of the cupboard and pours over the coffee into both.

"You're still here?" 

Jeno makes his way out of the room groggily, hair messy and disheveled. While the look suited him, he couldn't help but miss the way he always ensured his hair was brushed neatly. He's still not smiling, eyes still filled with an intensity of emotions all in one. Despite this, he looked better rested than when Renjun first arrived, which was pleasing in itself. 

"I wanted to make sure you were okay," he responds softly, voice barely above a whisper. Lifting his head, he takes in the living room from where he stands. His mouth tugs at a corner. "I cleaned up a bit. Made some food too because you can't live on all that take-out food."

"You cooked?" Rather than the surprise in his voice offending him, Renjun can't help but smile. Back when they still saw Jeno (before he up and disappeared across the country and never reached out again per his return), Renjun was the last person to do the cooking. He was, however, still so much better than Mark, but at the end of the day, it was Jeno who had done most of the cooking for them. He almost scoffs.

"Don't sound so surprised. I cook," he announces proudly. It doesn't last more than a minute before the situation dawns on him and he's lowering his head again. "I'm sorry we're not meeting under better circumstances."

As he steps over into the lounge, he suppresses a sigh, halting in his steps as he lifts his head and catches Jaemin's eye. He's standing by the couch, seeming unsure as to whether he wanted to sit or not. Jaemin's eyes flicker over to Jeno. Renjun fights to stop from following his gaze.

"I am too," Jeno murmurs somewhere behind him. Footsteps close in, and then they're standing beside each other.

"Je?" 

He planned to say more than that, but the words catch in his throat. It's like somewhere along the lines of finding out their connections to each other and everything that happened, he forgot how to speak to Jeno without feeling partially guilty. Guilty because in some way, it was his fault for being Jaemin's soulmate. He was the reason the two of them weren't soulmates; the reason Jeno was hurting when Jaemin didn't show and the reason Jaemin felt useless with the entire situation. If Renjun wasn't around, they may have been soulmates; they would have been reconnected like every happily ever after story went. But that wasn't going to happen because Renjun was around. He sucks in a breath. 

"Yeah?" He can feel Jeno's eyes on him, unwavering.

"It's not your fault." He turns toward him. "Jaemin doesn't blame you, so don't go blaming yourself either, okay?" Lifting a hand, he taps the top of Jeno's head with the back of his fist, a small smile tugging across his lips. It's definitely something Jeno would do.

"Is he here?"

"Would it matter?"

Uncertainty crosses his face and then, as an after thought, he grits his teeth. Hands curling into fists at his side, he lowers his head. There must be a battle going on inside his head that Renjun couldn't begin to imagine the intensity of. "Tell him I'm sorry—"

"He looked for you too, you know," he cuts Jeno off because really there was no need to hear his apologies. His apology wasn't necessary because he wasn't at fault no matter how much he believed it. Jaemin didn't need to hear another aimless apology either. He starts to move, but halts when coffee spills out of the cup and onto his hand, his lips parting to release a soft hiss as he hurriedly places the cup down. A wet cloth is shoved into his hand, Jeno wrapping it around the area the coffee spilled.

"You're not just saying that are you?"

He shakes his head. "He came to you, but when he realized, it hurt him too."

"He saved me because I was his soulmate. I was supposed to be. He should be alive right now. With you."

"He saved you because he loved you. And he'd do it again." Shifting all the weight onto his other foot, he wraps an arm around Jeno and pulls him into an embrace. "Let's stay in touch this time, okay?"

"I'd like that." Jeno smiles in a way that it just misses his eyes; not quite reaching them, but the fact that he's smiling is more than enough.

They finish their coffee together. All the while, Renjun is more than aware of Jaemin's eyes on the two. He'd pay a pocket full of pennies just to know what was going on in his mind. In any other situation, he may have asked, but he chose not to. Speaking to Jaemin in front of Jeno felt wrong, somehow. Like he was committing a crime. He avoided mentions of their common grounded friend. When it was time to leave, he wrote down his number for Jeno who walked him up to the elevator right after. 

Jaemin didn't reappear until he was downstairs. He'd been following closely behind, but hadn't joined Renjun's side even when he and Jeno parted ways. He found him waiting downstairs. His hair was messy, a gentle smile gracing his face.

"Thank you," Jaemin murmurs softly.

Thank you, Renjun wanted to say. Thank you for coming back. 

Instead, a silence settles between them and the two made their way home together. He was a little glad that Jeno wasn't Jaemin's soulmate. If they had been soulmates, Renjun wouldn't be here, walking side by side with Jaemin.