The Christmas Package

Chapter one: Sad and single

It was one week before Christmas and Sandra still didn’t have a date for the Christmas work bonanza. Not that she had time for that kind of thing. Being a full time corporate lawyer meant putting the rest of her life on hold, and she was okay with that. After all, what could be more fulfilling in life than sleeping on a couch next to her massive paycheck?

Sandra was in the office lady’s room washing her hands when she looked in the mirror and noticed that she had stunning blue eyes and straight blonde hair.  She was dressed in a sleek black skirt and low cut pink blouse. She had all the right curves but she was hideous (obviously, that’s why she was single).

“Hey Sandra.” Said Sandra’s friend Veronica who was always sneaking up on people in the bathroom to get gossip. “Got a date for the bonanza yet?”

“I don’t have time for that kind of thing,” said Sandra. “I’m successful.”

“Oh, I forgot,” said Veronica. “Did you hear who Sally’s bringing?”

“No, who?”

“Well remember when she went to Venice last year? I guess she found herself this super hot Italian guy. And rich too. She’s so fulfilled emotionally and physically that she doesn’t even have to come to book club anymore.”

“That’s not fair!” Said Sandra, throwing her hands up. But she quickly remembered that she didn’t care about these things. “I mean, that’s nice.”

“Yeah. It is. So I’ll see you at book club?”

Sandra nodded, dismally. It wasn’t like she had any urgent romantic date to get to or anything. Because she was single and unattractive and successful.

She sighed and said, “See ya later Veronica.”

As she walked out of the bathroom she ran into somebody’s sculpted body and they both fell over in the hall, work papers went everywhere!

“Oh,” she said, looking up. It was Chris Crispin, the office nerd. He adjusted his glasses awkwardly and flushed red at the sight of her. She wondered why he always blushed when he saw her. It wasn’t like she was beautiful or anything. “Sorry Chris!”

“It’s okay,” he said, and hurried to collect the papers. “I mean- uh, are you okay? I should help you up. Right?”

“No-really, that’s alright,” said Sandra who didn’t want to be seen being helped by the office nerd. With some great effort she managed to pull herself up without the help of a man.

“Maybe we could hang out some time!” Chris called after her, but by then she had gotten just far enough away from him to pretend she hadn’t heard him.

When Sandra reached her desk she sat down with a heavy sigh. What a day. Veronica pestering her, Sally having a hot date, Chris being…Chris. What could possibly make this day worse?

“Attention everyone!” Said Sally’s corporate boss, Steve. “Just to remind you, the Christmas Bonanza is only a few days away. And that means that I’ll be expecting all of you to bring that special someone along. In fact, anyone who doesn’t bring a date…Sandra….is going to have to wear this alienating hat.” He held up a pointy hat that had the words ‘sad and single’ printed on it.

“Oh no!” Said Sandra.

“Oh no,” came the echo from Chris’s desk.

“Oh no,” said Veronica with a sly grin as she began to put together a Christmas plot. An idea which she decided to bring up at book club.

“Hey Sandra, what if you and Chris went to the Christmas bonanza together?”

Sandra carefully spat her wine back into her glass. She should have seen this coming. After all, book club was less about books and more about ladies night out with Mr. Merlot. They were at Sally’s house tonight and her hunky Italian boyfriend was making Borsht.

“That is a great idea!” Said Sally. “He’s single. You’re single….” She paused then as though this in itself was more than enough to prove that they were perfect for each other.

“Yeah. And he definitely likes you,” Veronica added.

“But Chris is the worst!” Said Sandra. She couldn’t remember why Chris was the worst, but he definitely was. “And besides, I don’t need a man in my life. I’m successful.”

“Oh,” said Sally and Veronica, “we forgot.”

“More Borsht?” Asked Ivan Smirnoff, Sally’s smok’n Italian boyfriend.