Dear Angery {Ziall Horlik} UNDER REVISION

Entry 1

Dear fucking diary,

Paul says I should write my feeling in some shitty book to "release my anger".

Its the dumbest thing ever. I mean screw him! I don't need a stupid book to write my feelings in, (but I have nothing better to do and it beats talking to him 3 times a week, so don't think this is a regular thing). Paul says I have "anger issues" which is true. I get mad very easily, but they're not "issues". Mum says I'm just more 'short tempered' then most. but that's just a nice way of putting it.

I mean, I speak my mind, and defend myself then people call me "short tempered".

Fuck them man.

Anyway, I'm supposed to introduce myself apparently so. . .

I'm Niall Horan, I'm 18 years old, but this damn baby face of mine sure doesn't make me look like it (It may be "cute" to girls, but it's really inconvenient for going out to pubs with Harry.)

I guess my life is average, other than me having to visit a bitchy psychiatrist named Paul 3 times a week (did that hurt your feelings Paul? Good), I do good in school, meaning I get more than enough to pass. It's all a waste of my time though, the only reason I show up is for Harry. He's my best - and only - friend. I don't know why he sticks with a loser like me. All the girls love him, and if I didn't have eye on someone else, I'd be all over him too. I play guitar, and sing a little. My favourite subject is music, maths and lunch. I'm scrawny and short, hence the future leprechaun references. (Was that god enough Paul? Or do you want more details about my oh so exciting life?)

...Im a potty mouth, but I bet you already guessed that...

You're not even real. . .

Ok now I'm talking to you as if you're a real person.

What else...

Oh right. School.

Anyway, I have most classes with Harry, except for Spanish and history, which is pretty boring because then I have no one else to talk to except for that damned Liam Payne. He's fuckig annoying, trying to get me to talk to him and always smiling. Like, who the hell smiles all the time?! His happiness makes me sick. He's probably one of the people who frustrate me the most. There's no one worst then him. Well except maybe Louis Tomlinson. He's like 25 years old (paedophile that one is) and is still in my year. Ok maybe I'm exaggerating but I'm not kidding when I say he's old. He's like 10 years older than me.

Then there's Zayn Malik. Hottest boy in school, not to mention most popular. He's part of the football team (He's like the Messi of our school) and basically every other sports team there is. He's pretty mysterious and I guess that adds to the hot boy demeanor. He can make a straight guy gay with one look. He makes everyone stand and bow in repesct, even the faculty! He's my 'man crush' you'd say. Okay, not man crush he's like my crush crush, and it's his fault I realized I'm gay.

For him.

But he's never even spared me a glance, except that one time in the caf where we we're walking to our usual table (by we I mean me and Harry) when I turned my eyes to meet his.

It lasted like, 10 seconds!

And I died inside during those 10 seconds. But then of course my moment was short lived because I heard someone say something about me being a fag and then the rest was kinda a blur, (although next thing I knew, I was in Simons' office again, I was next to some kid with a broken nose and black eye).

Serves him right.

But of course, I cherished that moment forever because I know a kid like me would never get the attention of a kid like Zayn Malik, much less his love and affection. Well one can only dream right?...

God that was so feminine, this sounds more like a diary then some anger book. I'm going before I turn into those stereotypical gay men who have high voices and talk about their feelings.

Ugh.

That was homophobic.

Whatever bye.