Clip #15: The Graveyard, Part One

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Apparently, my brain can only not do angst for so long.

I am the embodiment of angst. I am the Goddess of Angst. I shall bless this story with angst.

*throws angsty glitter*

Enjoy le angst!

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Leyla POV

It was proving harder than anticipated to purge South Evanson from my thoughts, even with Grey by my side. A song would come on the radio and I would remember when he sang it to me. I couldn't drive past the farm where the haunted corn maze had been, couldn't go to the Palace of Jump with my friends or family. I would go to text him something silly I'd done or something I'd accomplished, but then remember that he had someone new now. Someone to make him happier.

Oh, how I despised that song. Perhaps I have grieving South, and this was my anger stage because his using that song as an excuse to dump me for some beautiful ballerina filled me with fury.

How convenient for him that he was the only one out of the two of us who really was happier.

He had a gorgeous, talented girlfriend, the scholarship to JPANY. His dreams were coming true.

While I was still here in my boring hometown, still unable to get over my sister's death from three years ago and third-wheeling with my best friend and her stupid boyfriend, who were still deliriously happy. I had been pulled out of the theater program by my mom because of my increasingly bad grades and had lost half my friends along with it.

I spent most of my days alone in my room with Poseidon, drawing and writing and just wishing I could talk to Lacie about the huge mess of feelings I was trapped in.

But there was Grey.

Always there with a smile, a joke, a bit of light in my lonely world. We were only friends but had notified one another of our growing feelings for one another. We agreed to take it slow and help me refind my footing before becoming more.

Plus, Grey had at least one thing on South so far- he adored cats. He doted on Poseidon, my black-and-white kitten, as if he were his own child.

He even told me that when he grows up he's going to be a crazy cat lady.

Which, honestly, I could totally see.

So, as thinking on South brought bitterness and sorrow, dwelling upon my growing feelings for Grey brought me a bit of joy and happiness in the dark place I couldn't seem to escape.

I had a hard time letting things go. I would forever blame myself for Lacie's death and I would forever wonder why South Evanson decided Jill was better than me. But when I was with Grey, I forgot all that.

----

I got into my car and drove to the graveyard, winding down the narrow dirt paths to find the grave I was looking for.

It was under a tree, surrounded by grass, the smooth stone of the gravestone visible from where I parked my car. It was exactly how it had been the last time I was here, except there was a dying rose in the cup by the grave. I figured it was from Jonah, he left a rose for Lacie every Valentine's Day.

I kelt at the base of the grave, brushing my fingers across the shining stone. It was cold to the touch. I traced the letters in her name.

Lacie Diane Thomson.

Beloved Sister, Daughter, Friend.

03/10- 07/25 (Aged Sixteen Years Old)

My heart twinged. Sixteen. She had been younger than me. She would never be married before me, never name her kids after heroes. She would never give me nieces and nephews. We would never go to Europe together, never go to movies on the weekends to get away from our kids. She would never be my bridesmaid, and I would never be hers.

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