In Your Corner | ✓

Ten

Both Josh and I have a fitful night.

He thrashes around in his sleep, clearly reliving his awful experience. Each time, I wake him up and calm him down, only to feel him have another nightmare not long later.

When I rouse him from a nightmare at seven o'clock, I rest my head on his chest – disregarding the sweat that clings to his t-shirt – and let out a breath.

"I'm sorry."

My neck snaps back and I narrow my eyes at him. "What are you apologising for, Josh?"

He looks anguished. "You've hardly slept. I shouldn't have asked. Should've just gone home."

I shift so that I'm propping myself up on my forearms, next to him. "Don't say that, Josh. I'm glad you let me do this. I couldn't have just left you like that last night."

I'm still trying to get my head around what happened last night and I imagine that Josh is struggling badly, much more so than me.

His eyes soften a little. "Thank you. I'm- just, thank you."

Gently, I reach out and brush a curl away from his damp, perspired forehead. "It's okay."

My heart thuds loudly in my chest. How is it that despite the absolute horror show that was last night, lying in his arms like this somehow brings me comfort?

It doesn't make any sense.

"How are you, um, holding up?" I ask quietly, because I want to know, even if I'm going to hate the answer. More importantly, though, I want him to know that I care.

A plethora of emotions skate across his features and then he looks away. "Uh."

"You don't have to say anything, if you don't want to."

"Not yet."

His arms squeeze around my waist, though, as if he's trying to tell me that it's nothing to do with me: he just doesn't want to talk about it right now.

So, I just close my eyes for a minute and put my head back down, resting it on his bicep. It flexes under me a little, but then stills.

Slowly, his arm that I'm resting on settles on my upper back, palm lying flat. The other hand is curled around my waist.

He can probably hear my thundering heart, but it's not like there's much I can do about it at this stage.

"I don't really have any plans today," I utter, my lips brushing his t-shirt covered bicep as I speak. "So, you know, you're welcome to stay around today for as long as you like. If you just wanna hang in bed all day, that's cool."

It's really hard to tell what he might want to do and what he doesn't. I'm struggling to figure out exactly what he wants or needs from me right now, but I eventually decide that it's better to say something than nothing at all.

Josh hums in the back of his throat. "Don't tempt me."

I just smile, knowing there's not much else to say. The offer's there and he'll take it if he wants it. Equally, if he wants to go home and try to forget it all, that's also okay.

Not that I can forget it. I'm trying really hard to figure out if I know the guys from the alley last night, but I'm coming up blank. They didn't look particularly athletic, or anything, so it's just really hard to tell.

"Are the girls coming back?" he asks quietly, a vulnerable edge in his tone.

I blow out a breath, glancing at the clock that displays just after seven. "Probably not for a while. It's still a little too early, I think."