I Hate You, I Love You - Drarry

Part 6: Alabaster in the Moonlight

Christmas break sped its way around the corner and unexpectedly smacked Harry right in the face. It seemed as though the school year had just started, yet somehow he was waving on the train platform to his friends as they made the long-awaited journey back to their homes. Home. What a strange term. How it can mean a different place for everyone and be spoken as the same word. Although they were all leaving, Harry felt at home here, at Hogwarts. This was the only place he ever felt this kind of happiness, of comfort.

Ron cried out the train's foggy window, "Have a Happy Christmas Harry!"

"We'll write every day!" Hermione followed, squeezing her face between Ron's and the glass.

"Ya, totally!" Ron replied, a lie showing through his flushed features. Hermione elbowed him.

"You will," she asserted with a deathly stare.

"Bye guys!" Harry called as the train screeched away, heading back to the outside world, leaving Harry alone.

"Pathetic," he heard a familiar voice over his shoulder. He jumped out of shock and spun around to see a blonde boy holding a superior expression and dark green malice glowing from his smirk.

"Malfoy," Harry relaxed. "You gave me a heart attack. I thought I was the only one at the castle." He awkwardly scratched his messy brown hair with a finger.

"I already told you I was staying here over the break, remember?" he gestured his annoyance.

"Yes, but I thought it wasn't true because you have a house to go home to. A family to go home to. Why would you stay?"

"Isn't that a little personal Potter? Something you don't need to know?" he said angrily, getting red and haughty.

Harry backed down, he didn't realize it was intrusive. "Sorry," he mumbled and started his walk back up to the castle. He glanced over his shoulder to see if Draco was coming back as well. Malfoy was just standing there, staring at him. Creep. He picked up the pace.

❄❄❄❄

Over the first few days of the holiday break, Harry and Draco completely ignored each other. They would purposefully stagger their meal times so they wouldn't run into the other- making the house elves bring them supplies so they didn't have to cross paths, spending the whole day lingering in their own dormitories just to avoid all contact.

One pale-lit night in the early morning, Harry laid back on his pillow. He couldn't stop wondering why Draco decided to stay here, abandoning his family, or was it the opposite? Did the Malfoys not want to see Draco, or was it the other way around? He couldn't release the thoughts. They kept pummeling his intrusive brain, his wandering conscience. Maybe if he got a glimpse at the life Draco had, the answer to his burning questions would be obvious.

In a half-asleep daze, his delirious mind dreamt up a plan that Harry would never have thought of if his head had been clearer. Sluggishly, he threw his limp legs off the side of the bed, searching for his slippers. He shrugged on his school robes to shield him from the icy bite of the cold corridors that he would encounter. Stumbling over to the end of his bed, he lifted his trunk. Knowing what he was looking for, his hand brushed the silken material, like water, in a form of fabric. With a swoop, he lifted the Invisibility Cloak before him, surveying his state of mind. Was he really about to spy on Draco? This is so stupid. He set down the cloak. Draco's harsh words nagged the back of his brain. Pathetic. Malfoy was right. He tipped the trunk's lid shut and slipped back under the covers.

An hour later he was descending the dark, dank, steps down to the dungeons. In his dazed rush, he realized he forgot his invisibility cloak. Oh well, it's not like there is anyone here to catch him. Harry just couldn't shake his curiosity. It's not his fault that he ended up face to face with the Slytherin house entrance doors. Blame it on his lack of sleep. It's not like he meant to get here. Well, that's exactly what he meant to do.

But how would he get in? The password should be easy to guess, probably something prejudiced. "Pure Blood," he whispered to the door, remembering his journey back in his Second Year. The door didn't budge. "Malfoy Supremacy." Nothing. This is going to be harder than he thought.

He spat cruel phrases and snotty remarks at the cold cobblestone door for nearly half an hour. He was about to give up when he starting listing off random names and words. "Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger," he growled. "Harry Potter!" he whisper-shouted, exasperated. A groan exerted from the stone walls and the entrance opened up. Harry stood in shock. He used his name? He stood dumbstruck.

But it quickly washed away when he realized his mission. The room was huge, open, and dark. Moss hung down on the walls and the ceiling windows were open despite the snow outside. A massive chandelier made of gunmetal hung from the ceiling in the center of the room, all the candles placed on it, blown out, the wax frozen in time.

He tip-toed through the common room, over to the dormitories- Draco was probably sleeping. Peering into the room, he saw a pale figure curled up in forest green blankets. He looked so gentle and harmless, the complete opposite of his usually intimidating composure.

Shocked by the innocent sight, he wandered closer. Now only a few meters away, he could make out details. The angles of his face. The worry in his eyebrows. The glint of moonlight that was faintly shining through the open windows bouncing off his alabaster skin. The little "o" his mouth made as if stuck in an emotion, unable to move forward.

Harry wondered what he was dreaming of. But then quickly corrected his strange inquiry, shoving the thoughts away.

Harry reached out a hesitant hand toward Draco's cornsilk hair. If only to touch it for a second, just to see how it felt. How soft it would be. His fingers found the blonde bangs and brushed them out of his eyes. Untangling the strands from the white eyelashes protruding from his pressed eyelids. Retracting his hand, he admired the boy's face. He really was beautiful in the sense of what people find elegant. The way his nose sloped, the pointed cheekbones and chin, the milky complexion.

Merlin's beard. What was he thinking?! Draco was not only the one person he hated most in the world, but he was a boy. A man.

Get a grip.

He sighed and took a look around the room. What was he even doing here?

A noise came from below his vision, freezing Harry in place. Tense, he glanced down, his eyes refusing to open all the way, dreading what might have just happened.

But Draco just stirred in his sleep, slightly shifting positions. Harry exhaled and quickly tried to move into the shadows.

Then, a sound so much louder than it should have been, came out of Draco's mouth, heavy with worry and fear.

"Harry?"