ADVENTURES WITH ROBERT

Chapter 1

I RECOMEND YOU READ THIS ALL IN A LOW DRAMATIC VOICE :D

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I saw her. She was inside that quaint coffee shop on the corner. I saw small snowflakes fall from the sky landing on the roof of my shitty car. I unbuckled my seat belt, while actually failing to do so and opened the car door. As I stepped outside, I slip and landed on my left butt cheek, it stings. I manage to get up but im limping toward the door. I push the door, but I imidiatly feel stupid. It said PULL. I mentally face palm and walk into the coffee shop. I feel the slight crunch of snow still stuck under my shoes. I stared at her from my seat in the corner of the shop. I was able to see the slight breath emiting from her mouth while she yawned. She saw me staring and she had a small half smile. She stood up and I gravitated towards her as she did to me. I was there standing in front of her, she ate Italian I can tell by the light smell of garlic and onion in her breath. We did this weird staring thing, *still better than twilight* and I began to speak to her. I didn't want to screw this up.

"Hello, my name is Robert, I'm 37 years old, I enjoy the company of my 6 cats and I'm really lonely these days, please check my Eharmony account for more information."

She stared at me for a moment. I turn on my heel and start walking away towards my car before she has the chance to reject me. The girl stood there dumbfounded and later looked almost like she was going to pee herself from laughter. I just drove away to my mom's house. Because my mom loves me.. Right? Well whatever. I went to my room and layed in my Hello Kitty blanket alone in the darkness. I cried. Much Sad. Much no. Much depress. Did you cri every tim? I did.