☽☾ bittersweet ☽☾

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☽☾ ☽☾ ☽☾

I felt numb. 

Completely numb.

My tears had long since run dry and my body had finally stopped shivering from the ruthless cold. Unbeknownst to me, there was an SUV waiting on the highway that picked us up and offered my kidnapper a spare change of clothes. 

Among the drivers was Kade. I could hear them muttering, whispering praises and awe to both of us but it fell upon deaf ears.

I felt like my heart had been gutted from my chest, but I could still appreciate the warmth the car heater offered me along with the blanket that had been thrown over my shoulders.  We were sitting in the back seat, Donovan purposefully putting a lengthy distance between the two of us. 

"Why did you bring that?" I heard his soothing voice ask after a heavily pregnant silence. I winced, tightening my grip around the neon orange ribbon wrapped stake and cast my gaze out the window, watching as the Black Forest turned into a blur as we raced down the highway. 

"Because," I fought back a cringe as I realized how raw my throat was from screaming, crying, and breathing in the horrendous cold. "I wanted material proof that you almost weren't fast enough to catch me." My words were hollow and cold, but what they really meant was: I wanted proof that I was almost fast enough to escape....

I couldn't look at him. I would fall apart all over agin. And yet he had the nerve to apologize?

"Why did you say that you were sorry when you caught me?" My voice quipped and I could sense Kade and the other enforcer growing increasingly awkward at our conversation. 

"You wouldn't understand," His voice was musical, and I hated how my body reacted to him, how it chased the numbness away.

"I wouldn't understand?" I sneered, closing my eyes. "You caught me for the sheer purpose of displaying that you could. Your refusal to explain just proves how fragile your masculinity is."

I held my breath after my harsh words were cast out into the open and I instantly recalled who I was talking to. But instead of striking me, hurling hurtful words, or even throwing me out of the car, he maintained his silence. 

"We're almost back?" Kade swiftly intercepted our heated discussion and I lay my head agains the icy window, feeling the car bump down the gravel road. When the SUV eased to a stop, I could see the large crowd congregating in front of the castle-like mansion, anticipation twirling in the air. 

As the doors flew open I spoke once more. 

"You're right." 

Donovan looked back at me, his expression unreadable as he waited for me to continue. I could feel the humiliation bubbling within me, the hot tears returning to my eyes and my throat swelling shut. Defeat tasted bitter, rejection left a lingering ache, and I lashed out. I wanted to hurt somebody, anybody, just so that I wouldn't be the only one in pain. 

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