[Passageway]
(As the ledge below the submarine slowly crumbles under its weight.)
ZHUKOV: But what can he do, stuck down here like the rest of us? How bad can it be?
DOCTOR: This sub's stuffed with nuclear missiles, Zhukov. It's fat with them. What do you think Skaldak's going to do when he finds that out? How bad can it be? How bad can it be? It couldn't be any worse.
(Some tumbling rocks hit the submarine and water pours through a hatch. It gets closed quickly.)
DOCTOR: Okay. Spoke to soon.
[Turbine room]
STEPASHIN: Hello? Who's there? Who's there? Who's there!
(Something is moving behind the pipes. Then a pair of slender, three fingered hands reach out for his head from behind.)
STEPASHIN: What do you want with me?
SKALDAK: Much.
[Control room]
ZHUKOV: Comrades, you know our situation. The reactor is drowned. We are totally reliant on battery power and our air is running out. Rescue is unlikely, but we still have a mission to fulfil. If the Doctor is right, then we are all that stands between this creature and the destruction of the world. Control of one missile is all he needs. We are expendable, comrades. Our world is not. I know I can rely on every one of you to do his duty without fail. That is all.
[Turbine room]
STEPASHIN: Listen to me. We both understand each other. This, this mewling time of peace, it doesn't suit us. We are both warriors, and together we can form an alliance.
SKALDAK: An alliance?
STEPASHIN: Yes. To win the Cold War.
SKALDAK: Cold War?
STEPASHIN: Both sides are capable of completely obliterating the other. It's a state we call mutually assured destruction.
SKALDAK: Mutually assured destruction. But this has not occured.
STEPASHIN: No.
SKALDAK: Not yet.
[Control room]
CLARA: Even if a missile did get launched, that wouldn't be it, would it?
DOCTOR: It?
Isabella : End of the world. Game over. I mean, what if they fired one by accident. What would happen then?
DOCTOR: I told you, Isabella . Earth is like a storm waiting to break, right now. Both sides baring their teeth, talking up war. It would only take one tiny spark.
CLARA: Yeah, but the world didn't end in 1983, did it, or I wouldn't be here.
DOCTOR: New. History's in flux. It can be changed. Re-written.
(The crew are all armed with rifles.)
DOCTOR: How many of us are left?
ZHUKOV: Twelve. And we can't find Stepashin.
DOCTOR: We split up and comb this sub. One team stays here to guard the bridge.
ZHUKOV: That's it? That's the plan?
DOCTOR: Well, it's either that or we stay here and wait for him to kill us.
ZHUKOV: Okay.
Isabella : Is it true you've never seen one outside of its shell suit?
DOCTOR: Shell suit? Isabella! For an Ice Warrior to leave its armour is the gravest dishonour. Skaldak is desperate. He is deadly and we have got to find him.
GRISENKO: Will this help?
(The sonic screwdriver.)
DOCTOR: Ah! You saved it.
GRISENKO: No, no, it was on the floor with this.
(The Barbie doll. The Doctor kisses it.)
DOCTOR: Ah, Professor, I could kiss you.
GRISENKO: If you insist.
DOCTOR: Later.
[Submarine]
ONEGIN: Do you think it's true, sir? A Martian?
BELEVICH: I don't know what to think.
[Compartment]
CLARA: So, why have you got a cattle prod on a submarine?
GRISENKO: Polar bears.
Isabella : Ah, right.
GRISENKO: We run across them when we're drilling. Can be quite nasty, you know.
CLARA: I'd swap one for an Ice Warrior any day. Cuddlier.
GRISENKO: Courage, my dear. I always sing a song.
Isabella : What?
GRISENKO: To keep my spirits up.
CLARA: Yeah, that would work, if this was Pinocchio.
(The Doctor seems to have set off some alarms.)
GRISENKO: Do you know Hungry Like The Wolf?
Isabella : What?
GRISENKO: Duran Duran. One of my favourites. Come on.
CLARA: I'm not singing a song.
(The Doctor gets a hatch open and puts his head inside. They hear an echoing growl.)
Isabella : What was that?
DOCTOR: Pressure. Just pressure. We're seven hundred metres down, remember?
GRISENKO: Don't worry about it. Think of something else.
(He sings the opening phrase of his song.)
GRISENKO: I am hungry like the wolf.
CLARA: I'm not singing.
GRISENKO: Don't you know it?
Isabella : Course I know it. We do it at karaoke, the odd hen night.
GRISENKO: Karaoke? Hen night? You speak excellent Russian, my dear, but sometimes I don't understand a word you're talking about.
[Submarine]
ONEGIN: If we get out of here, we'll be bloody heroes.
BELEVICH: If we get out of here.
ONEGIN: The first people in the world to discover a genuine, living
BELEVICH: Alien?
(Which reaches down and lifts the hapless helmsman up by his head.)
BELEVICH: I don't know. You hear stories, don't you. Stories about the things the Kremlin doesn't want us to
(Then he realises he is alone.)
BELEVICH: Onegin? Onegin!
(The Doctor, Clara Isabella and Grisenko hear the growls and screams, and run towards them. We only see a stiff arm and hand sticking up.)
GRISENKO: Good God. Torn apart. It's a monster, a savage.
DOCTOR: No, Professor. Not savage. Forensic. Well, he's dismantled them. Skaldak's learning. Learning all about you. Your strengths, your weaknesses. Come on.
(They go down a passageway.)
DOCTOR: Stay here.
CLARA: Okay.
DOCTOR: Stay here. Don't argue.
Isabella : I'm not.
DOCTOR: Right. Good.
(He goes up a ladder.)
GRISENKO: Oh, it's a young man's game, all this dashing about. Clara, what is it?
CLARA: I was doing okay. I mean, I went in there and I did the scary stuff, didn't I? I went in there with the Ice Warrior and it went okay. Actually, it went just about as badly as it could have done but that wasn't my fault.
GRISENKO: Not at all.
Isabella : So I'm happy about that.
GRISENKO: Yes.
CLARA: Chuffed.
GRISENKO: And so you should be. So what's the matter?
Isabella : Seeing those bodies back there. It's all got very real. Are we going to make it?
GRISENKO: Yes, of course.
(Elsewhere, there is a growl and something flashes past a grating.)
ZHUKOV: It's in the walls.
(Meanwhile, the Doctor finds a body.)
DOCTOR: Oh, Stepashin.
(The Doctor hears running feet above him.)
DOCTOR: Oh, oh, oh. Fast. He's fast.
(And, with more creaking and growling -)
CLARA: What was that?
GRISENKO: The Doctor told you, it's just the boat settling. Tell me about yourself. What do you like doing? Clara? Clara?
Isabella : Stuff. You know, stuff.
GRISENKO: Stuff. Very enlightening. And the Doctor, what he said. Is it true you're from another time? From our future? Clara Isabella ?
CLARA: Yes.
GRISENKO: Tell me what happens.
Isabella : I can't.
GRISENKO: Well, I need to know.
CLARA: I'm not allowed.
GRISENKO: No, please.
Isabella : I can't!
GRISENKO: Ultravox, do they split up?
(Isabella laughs.)
CLARA: Funny. You're funny.
(Then Skaldak grabs her head from above.)
GRISENKO: Let her go!
(Grisenko shoots and Skaldak retreats.)
GRISENKO: See? I don't just like Western music
(Skaldak grabs Grisenko as the Doctor runs up.)
Isabella : No, please don't hurt him. Please!
SKALDAK: You attacked me. Martian law decrees that the people of this planet are forfeit. I now have all the information I require. It will take only one missile to begin the process. To end this Cold War.
DOCTOR: Grand Marshal, there is no need for this. Listen to me.
SKALDAK: My distress call has not been answered. It will never be answered. My people are dead. They are dust. There is nothing left for me except my revenge.
(The armour in the torpedo room activates.)
DOCTOR: There is something left for you, Skaldak. Mercy.
SKALDAK: Mercy?
ZHUKOV: You must wear that armour for a reason, my friend. Let's see, shall we?
DOCTOR: No, Captain, wait!
ZHUKOV: I will do whatever it takes to defend my world, Doctor.
DOCTOR: Yes, great, fine, good, but we are getting somewhere here. We are negotiating. Jaw-jaw not war-war.
GRISENKO: Churchill?
DOCTOR: Churchill.
ZHUKOV: Very well, we'll negotiate, but from a position of strength.
SKALDAK: Excellent tactical thinking. My congratulations, Captain.
ZHUKOV: Thank you.
SKALDAK: Unfortunately, your position is not, perhaps, as strong as you might hope.
(We have been getting glimpses of Skaldak in the dark. Red glowing eyes, lipless mouth, all copyright H G Wells, in my opinion.)
DOCTOR: What do you mean?
(Enter the armour, which has broken its shackles. Skaldak releases Grisenko and drops into it.)
DOCTOR: He summoned the armour.
Isabella : How did it do that?
DOCTOR: Sonic tech, Isabella . The song of the Ice Warrior.
(A submariner empties his rifle at the back of the armour.)
DOCTOR: No!
SKALDAK: My world is dead but now there will be a second red planet. Red with the blood of humanity!
DOCTOR: Skaldak! Skaldak, wait!
YOU ARE READING
The Story of a Mad Man with a Box (Series 7) Doctor Who
ActionSeries 7 has been described as being a series of "movies" squeezed into forty-five minutes, although The Snowmen was sixty minutes. The first half is about the Doctor deleting himself from the universe to hide from the deadly Silence, who attempted...
