𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡/𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬

𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐞

i let out a sigh.

looking at myself in the mirror is so exhausting. i was never pleased with what i saw. i never looked like all the girls on instagram. my eyebrows were uneven, my nose was too big, my forehead was gigantic, my hair wasn't all smooth and silky.

and my body?

god don't even get me started.

no matter how much weight i gained or lost i always looked bad. never slim enough, never curvy enough, never hot enough, never pretty enough, never good enough.

never enough.

i felt hot tears run down my cheeks.

i hated myself. i was hideous. i wanted to curl up into a little ball and hide from the whole world. no one should ever have to see me, the ugly beast that i am.

why why why

why can't i look like the girls on instagram? their skin is flawless, their features are perfect and their bodies are all hourglass shaped.

it's not fair. i try so hard. everyday i adjust my appearance, change my diet, tweak my workout routine. i try to work on loving myself, telling myself beautiful things about me when i can.

but no. of course not, nothing can ever go right for me. i'll never look like them. i'll never be one of them. not even close.

i dropped to the floor, my elbows wresting on my knees covering my face while the endless stream of tears seeped from my face.

i heard the door jiggle.

can't i cry in peace?

"what" i called out, "why's the door locked" y/bf questioned. i rolled my eyes and went to unlock it, immediately turning my face away when i opened the door. "what's wrong?" he picked up on my attitude like lightning. "nothing" i muttered.

"babe come here" he grabbed my wrist pulling me towards him. i looked away. he pulled my face towards his direction, "why are you crying?" he asked. "nothing" "tell me" "it's stupid" "if it made you cry it's not stupid"

i sat down next to him. "i feel" i let out a sigh "ugly" i continued. "what?" he questioned "i said i feel ugly" i repeated myself "why do you feel ugly?" "i just do okay"

he got up dragging me to the mirror. he lifted up my shirt and wrapped his hands around my waist. "what is there to feel ugly about?" he whispered in my ear. i felt flustered.

"look at you, you're beautiful" he kissed my neck, his head resting on my shoulder. i turned away from the mirror. "cuz i got a small waist, pretty face with a big bank" he sang to me. i started laughing before i felt him smack my butt.

"why do you feel ugly babe? you're sexy as shit" he cheesed trying to cheer me up. "whateverrr" i said pushing him away playfully. i walked back into the room and he followed behind. "look you could for sure be an instagram model but i wouldn't want you to cuz i don't need no dude tryna steal my girl" i started laughing.

"hey alexa, play body by megan thee stallion" he requested, "now shake that ass girl" he told me.

a/n
i hate this and it's all over the place i'm sorry y'all :(

requests are open 🤍

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