Euphoria: Rue and Lexi

~5~

Rue's POV

I feel awful for treating Lexi how I did, but I honestly just needed to be alone. I heard that Jules is back in town, and I haven't been able to function properly. If I hate her so much, why am I this affected with her return? She fucking manipulated me for Christ's sake! But it hurts not to see her.

So here I am, on my bike, on my way to her house. I'm so fucking dumb.

When I get to her house, I park my bike and walk to her door. I hesitate before knocking. I am relieved that her her dad opened the door instead of her. He lets me in and tells me to see her upstairs.

I make my way to the staircase and slowly start up. My hands shake and my breath deepens with every step. I finally make to her door. I hear music coming from inside.

I take a deep breath and lightly knock on the door.

Nothing.

I breathe again, "Jules," I ask.

"Rue?" I heard from inside.

Oh shit.

I open the door and walk in to see Jules sitting on her bed.

"Hi," she smiles.

"I um... I was just..." I can't think right now. "Riding my bike, um... and I passed by your house.

And I don't know, I... it's Christmas time so..."

Jules just sits there staring at me.

"Your dad let me in," I say, not know what else to say.

She finally talks. "Uh, uh... yeah, he's really mad at me. I'm grounded." She chuckled.

"And I'm in therapy," she said looking a little disappointed.

She starts to tear up.

"I really missed you," she says.

I feel like I can't breath. "Missed you too," was all I could force out.

"Um, and I'm really sorry about like, everything that happened at the train station, leaving and stuff... It was really fucking stupid." She starts to sob.

I start to feel tears in my own eyes.

"Fuck, I don't know why I'm crying," I say weakly. "I just get really emotional during the holidays, that's all."

"That's okay."

I can't stand this any longer. This was a mistake. 

"Yeah, Merry Christmas Jules," I say and run out of her room.

I bike straight to Fez's place and bang on his door. But I notice that his car isn't here.

"Shit!" I say under my breath.

I need drugs, I need that feeling of feeling like the world has stopped.

That's when I realize, I need Lexi.