Sincerely, Mom

1

Dear Rosie,

I'm sorry for poisoning you.

But you have to see that,
Your soul was just too pure to be left untouched.
I did you a favor because, with anyone else, you wouldn't have been able to feel that same connection that's between us.

Maybe one day, you'll see that I was doing what was best for you.
You don't want to get into the real world, and only then find out the cold, hard truth.

And Rosie,
I'm sorry for bruising you.
But I couldn't just keep this burden that I brought upon myself,
To myself.
And I needed to release some of that onto you because, that's what you're here for,
Right?

I raised you Rosie, and I gave you life.
You wouldn't be here without me.

I think you should be thanking me Rosie.
I only toughened you up so when you come again in contact with someone who uses your body as their own punching bag,
You'll already have been there, Rosie.
You'll know how to take it.

You're welcome Rosie.

I kept you up all night with the constant reminder that you will never be good enough for anyone or anything,
So you might as well just settle for whatever you can get.

Rosie, don't fight for what you want.
You know that you can never have it.
You're dreams are unattainable unless they are my own.
You're life is worthless until I say otherwise.

Rosie, dont look at me like that.
Rosie, I'm your mother and you treat me with respect.

All these things I've done for you, yet you cry over the simplest of things.
Toughen up Rosie or you'll never make it.
I raised you better than that.

I hope you never forget me Rosie.
I hope I've left a mark deep down in your being. A mark that is constantly reforming itself painfully inside of you.
Twisting and turning,
Pressing against the things that were once there to fuel your life.

But realize, Rosie, that I'm here now and that's my job.
I keep you alive and you're here for me Rosie.

My mark will grow, and spread, and push out anything that's in its way.
You will learn to need me, Rosie.
You are nothing without me.

I love you Rosie,
And I know you love me too.

Sincerely,
Mom.