If Dean had known how nice Heaven could be, he would have killed himself years ago!
... maybe that's not such a good opening.
Still, standing on this bridge with his brother, gazing out into the beautiful mysteries of Heaven that he's yet to explore, he has to admit that death has done him well.
And the beauty of Heaven, he realizes, is that he has all of eternity to explore it. He's not limited by the fear of death anymore. He's not limited by human capability. He can do whatever he wants, whenever he wants, and he can do it with whomever he wants to do it with. There's so much to do, so many people to see, and all the time in the world to do it.
Where is he supposed to start? He's already seen Bobby; he's obviously already seen Sam. Who should he visit next? Should he go back to the Roadhouse? Maybe he'll find Ellen, Jo, and Ash waiting for him. It's been so long since he's seen them and there's so much he has to tell them.
Or maybe he should go visit his parents. Their last family dinner meant everything to him. He can't imagine how much nicer it will be without the end looking over everything. He can't remember the last time all four of them were truly happy together. Hell, he's not sure that's ever happened. He'd like to think they could fix that now.
Who else will he find here? Charlie? She's gotta be around here somewhere, and after how she went out — and the fact that it wasn't supposed to be her fight to begin with — Dean feels like he owes her an apology. And, as nice as it was to see the other-dimension Charlie, it only served as a reminder of how much he missed his little sister.
He hates the thought that there are some people who will never be here. He'll never see Benny. He'll never see Crowley. He'll never see Garth. Just about anyone supernatural is lost forever. The only exceptions — he assumes, at least; he hasn't been here long enough to know for sure — are the celestials, those who can come and go as they please: people like Jack and...
"Cas," Dean whispers. That has to be him. Dean would recognize that tan trenchcoat anywhere, and even the shade of the forest isn't going to change that. Cas is here. He's really here.
"Cas?" Sam repeats, immediately looking around for him. "He's here? Now? How did he...?"
"Dude moves quick," Dean says with a small smile. He was wondering how long it would take to get to see the guy again. When Bobby told him that Cas had someone made it out alive... well, he doesn't know how he felt, but he does know that they have a lot to talk about.
Dean pushes himself away from the railing and takes off running. He's a ways away in the woods — leave it to Cas to overcomplicate their reunion like that — but no distance is going to keep them apart. Dean runs past his car and past the end of the bridge, but when he reaches the trees, he has to drop his gaze to the ground to make sure he doesn't trip over the roots. He makes it a little ways into the forest, then looks up where Cas is —
Where Cas was.
"Cas?" Dean looks around, but he's nowhere to be seen. He was right there. Dean saw him. He knows he did. So where did he go? He cups his hands around his mouth and calls out, "Cas!" louder this time.
There's no answer.
Dean looks around, confused, but all he sees in the trees is his brother running towards him. As glad as he is to have his brother around, right now, he just wants to see Cas again.
"Hey, what's up?" Sam finally catches up to him, panting slightly. "Where's Cas?"
"I..." Dean looks around one more time, then sighs. "I don't know. He just... disappeared."
"Are you sure he was here?" Sam asks. "I mean, I didn't see him."
"He was," Dean insists. "I swear, he was right here. He was right..." He shakes his head. "I don't know. Maybe I'm just seeing things."
Sam pats him on the back. "Don't worry. He'll come around."
"I guess," Dean says reluctantly. Logically, he knows Sam is right. Cas can't be everywhere at once; he's probably just busy. They haven't been dead very long, after all. Cas may not even know they're here. He just hopes Cas shows up soon.
"Now come on," Sam says. "We've got a lot of other people to see."
Dean lets out a long breath. "Yeah, I guess so."
Sam cocks his head to the side. "Unless you don't want to...?"
"No, no, I do," Dean assures him. Of course he wants to see everyone. "It just -- without Cas, it feels like such a bittersweet victory."
"I know," Sam says sympathetically. "But there's no point in sitting around waiting for him when there are so many other people around."
"I guess."
Sam shakes his head, exasperated. "Look, if you want to throw yourself a pity party, you do that, but I'm gonna see if I can find Ellen and Jo. You coming?"
Dean hesitates, but he has to admit, Sam does have a point. They have all of eternity here. What's a few hours without Cas when compared to the rest of eternity?
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FanfictionIf Dean had known how nice Heaven could be, he would have killed himself years ago! Dean had always assumed he would only find peace in death. As it turns out, even that's not enough. It's nice to see everyone again, of course, but through all the c...