I can not ever express my feelings
Because of the guilt behind them
I feel so culpable of everything
I'm confused and thinking clearly is hard
That's why this is a freeverse poem
But I truly and profoundly hate myself
I am the manipulator to everyone, including myself
When I'm confused it all goes away when soft delicacy begins to swell
And the bright pink and crimson red begin to appear on soft delicacy
Others, many find this cowardly but its an escape
To the guilt and lack of any other feelings
I am selfish, even with the pain I endure
Because when you say you understand
You might but not my way. No one understands
No one. We are unique in the pain we endure
So please don't say "I understand"
Because you don't
Now I leave and let it all go because writing this hasn't helped
The coping strategies fail.
All I think of is the red crimson filling and endeavouring me
I am and deserve all the pain the people of the world have ever beared
Do not pity me ,
But let me be
