The Forbidden

Prologue

Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.
Mary Oliver
Anastasia's life had never been easy not since the day she was born from her mother's untimely death to her father disappearing from her life before she could even speak her first words or take her first steps and her having to stay with her bitter grandmother who only took her in because of the money she would get from Anastasia's inheritance but nonetheless Anastasia didn't care she just was happy that she had a roof over her head and food in her stomach and somebody who will look after her even if they didn't want to she was happy but that happiness soon ended along with her bittersweet peaceful life when her grandmother died in explosion that wouldn't leave any survivors but yet Anastasia somehow survived out of the explosion only leaving a small mark on the lower part of her back everybody wondered how this little girl was alive how did she make it those questions roamed through her life for ages it seemed like by the time Anastasia was about ten she moved to the states to be with her father since she had no relatives left in Moscow she was happy that she would finally get to meet her father she had so many questions like why did he leave?
Did he not love her? Did he ever love her mother? What made him leave? Even though Anastasia had so many questions going around in circles in her head and even though she was angry she made all that wash away by knowing that she would finally have a family again but soon enough her happiness was drowned out when she found out her father was in prison for a robbery and aggravated assault of a police officer and he had no chance of getting out anytime soon she was hurt she didn't understand why this was happening to her but she somehow learned to put that pain in a box and bury it away because at least she had siblings well half siblings she didn't know how they were going to react when they saw her but then again she had hoped that they would accept her but Anastasia hope soon disappeared yet again when she learned her siblings wanted nothing to do with her all except her big sister Robyn she was a beautiful caramel goddess with dazzling hazel green eyes Anastasia thought she was the most beautiful thing that she had ever seen in her life but she still didn't understand why her other siblings didn't like her were they jealous of her ? Was it her honey golden skin her hazel brown eyes or was it her foreign tongue that made them envious was that what made them hate her once again she put that pain inside that little box and buried it Anastasia went from home to home until she was 13 when she got deported back to Moscow to go stay with her mother's sister which she didn't even know she had an aunt once again she had questions surface in the back of her mind like why didn't she meet her when she was staying with her grandmother? Why didn't she take her in after her grandmother had died? Why is it now she's meeting her after moving to the states? Anastasia was supposed to be happy right at least she would be able to go back to Moscow and be with family Anastasia was anything but happy she was hurt she had to leave her sister her family who had been there since she came who took her in who loved her but then again Anastasia being Anastasia had to see the brighter side of things she's wasn't going to let anything come between her and her possible happiness but that light inside of her soon dimmed once again when she learned what the treacherous family was like the kids were anything but polite they were spoiled brats who didn't care anything about her or about her experience about what she had been through but only about what they could get her in trouble for and her aunt's husband well he was another story for another time but Anastasia had learned how to make some peace of the situation that's all she could do at that point in time but that soon enough ended when Anastasia was sent to a private institution in Berlin by her aunt because she couldn't take care of her anymore because she was becoming too much of a problem for her kids she was becoming a bad influence in her children life and her husband didn't want her there anymore so her aunt sent her away like it was nothing she felt betrayed how could she do that to her she was her family just as much as her kids were why did she have to do this to her why couldn't she love her all those thoughts made the girls happiness wash away even more and was replaced with insecurities was she really the problem ? Was she ruining people's lives? Was this her fault? But nonetheless she tried to think of happy thoughts maybe she could make some friends at this institution make some good memories that's all she could do at this point it's not like she had any other choice in this situation she put that pain that anger and even guilt that she felt inside that little box and buried it away even deeper than before Anastasia's hope once again was ruined when she stepped through the gate of Branwen academy it was supposed to be a place of safety and joy a place where you can be taught manners and how to behave like a proper child a child that any family would want it was supposed to teach her these things like how she would learn in any other private institution but it wasn't anything like that at all it was a far more devious place it taught you things of great horror It thought you how to use your body your mind to get whatever you wanted it taught you to be a Monster it ripped away any hope any love any happiness that you felt inside of your soul because if you feel any of those things then you couldn't be one of them you couldn't be a part of the society Anastasia learned that the hard way when she had her first victim out of a long list yet to come her way this is a story about Anastasia fenty and how she got that hope that was ripped away back
Well come to her story