Losing her hurt. My brain swimming in rum hurt less. Watching him inhale clouds of toxin hurt more.
Matt won't let anybody think any things wrong. Why? Because our father convinces everyone that our family is perfect. Matty acts normal around him but as soon as he's out the door you can hear the flick of a lighter and the swish of a flask. Personally I don't like acting and I'm terrible at it so my dad hates me for being the only realistic thing of his fantasy world. My stepmom, Lisa, has him convinced I have multiple mental disorders which is supposed to explain why I'm not perfect. Sometimes I laugh at the irony because her daughter actually has mental disorders. Jane is bipolar, unstable, has chemical imbalances, and the cherry on top is that she's tried to kill my brothers and I countless times. For Christmas I got a pocket knife from Matt and a door lock from Cody. Cody is my youngest brother who sleeps on my bedroom floor because Jane has hurt him the most. But also because he knows I'd do anything to protect him. Dad says I baby him too much but it's not babying, it's saving a life. Jane can flip out a knife in a blink of an eye, look you in the eye, and give you that crooked smile that makes your skin crawl.
It really is a perfect family. Just like Dad says. You've got the ignorant Dad, the evil stepmother, the two ugly stepsisters, one mentally insane and the other a preppy bitch, the depressed skater brother, the sensitive gay brother, and the 7th wheel. Me. The girl that hides but wants to be noticed at the same time. The girl that counts down the days to her 18th birthday and saves all her money for the first plane ticket out of here.
