Searching at the Darkness

Chapter 2

My smile is still there as Mrs. Mahogany walks to me. “Maddie.” She regards me casually as if we were close friends. Her smile is gone and replaced with some emotion I’ve never seen on her face.

“May I have a glass of water?” I say, my voice surprising me of how calm it is.

Mrs. Mahogany smirks slightly. “Always so eager to escape.” She looks back at Ms. Evil Nurse. “A glass of water, please, Judy.” So, Ms. Evil Nurse has a name. Mrs. Mahogany looks at me for a second. Then asks with a serious tone, “How are you feeling?”

I shrug, unsure of an answer. I look at my mom who is still crying her eyes out.

Mrs. Mahogany sighs softly and looks at Carol and Phillip. Judy walks back in the room and hands me the glass of water. I examine it to see if she spit in it. Looks clear. I drink slowly.

“Maddie has made progress. That we are all aware of. But.” She pauses, looking at me. “It has been in vain.”

My mother gasps loudly. “What do you mean?” My mother is incredulous.

Mrs. Mahogany calmly lifts a hand to gesture toward me. “Maddie has type two diabetes. We tracked her blood levels for so long… I just don’t understand how we missed it…” She falls silent. It is I who breaks that silence.

“Missed what?” I pressed, my voice demanding but still calm.

“It is not just your blood Maddie.” She looks at me and I see it. In her eyes. Fear. “It is your heart.”

I don’t know how to react. Cry? My mother sure is doing that. I just stay the same. I just look at Mrs. Mahogany. Should I scream? Cuss her out because they missed it? No, I’m not like that. I sigh very softly.

“What exactly is wrong?” I am again  surprised at my voice.

Mrs. Mahogany quickly composes herself and looks at me. “Your heart is not getting enough blood. It is running on the current amount it has now. Which made me curious to look more and I saw that it is not producing enough either.”

I’m utterly shocked, but I don’t show it. “All that from a blood test?”

She can’t help but smile just a little. “I looked at past blood work as well.” She sighs.

I shake my head tiredly. This is a lot to take in. “What’s our next step then?”

“No cheerleading or dancing or running. You have to drink more water, Maddie. Right now, there is very little we can do but give you some medicine to help the current blood flow. We will work from there.”

I look over at my parents. My mother still sobbing and my father listening intently.

“Maddie.” She regards me cautiously. “This is very serious. If your heart does not pump enough blood… It could shut your heart down. Or your brain. If everything fails.” She closes her eyes as if she was offering a silent prayer. She looks at me with serious doctor eyes. “You will need a new heart.”

I nod my head.

I am now in my dad’s Dodge Journey. I sit in the back seat like I always do and put my seat buckle on. I am silent in my thoughts. My mom is still sobbing her eyes out as we drive home. It’s such a long drive and I don’t want to hear her cries.

“Mom, please stop crying.” I say softly.

She sobs more.

“Mom.” I say louder.

She sobs.

“Carol!” I snap.

Her sobs stop and Phillip is scolding me. “Maddie! You do not talk to your mother that way. We are very worried about you.”