dear saije
i don't hate you its not your fault
its the society that making it wrong
the thoughts going through your head should be whisked away instead
we are attractive everyone can see
but this isnt therapy
being bi isnt being confused its being strong enough to identify the truth standing in your shoes
for the people that dont understand
i will not hide to make you comfortable
cause guess what that makes me uncomfartable
i am not fat and even if i was id rather be me then just bone
scraped away with the sound of your tone
my body is the only thing i can change
to fit into a society that makes me rearrange
it confuses me how people love me
love is a hug on the worst day ever
a slow kiss that makes it all better
and i dont feel worthy to the power of that smile
but to the hard slap and blurry vision of tile
i may not be extrodinary but im not ordinary
as my life goes watch on the sidelines
watch the curiouse stares in the good way
the small victories as they go play by play
im not one to live every one as my last day
but i enjoy the little things no matter what you say
my hair soon to be the escape from reality
my hair soon to be the expression for all to see
but what i do is not for you
just another step in My journey
my life is great i say as i put the mask on
i will not hide i say slipping on the costume
what a hipocrite i am
but i dont know what else to do
what if to say do i really know you
the masks stay on even in sleep
pretending like it isnt me
locked out of my own mind
stuck in reverse from time to time
i want to scream but what would be the next line
more lies hidden behind im fine
these are not doors but walls follow the signs
i say self- harm was not my way to get attention
but it was my way for you to see the real me
my family goes back and forth
like trees swaying in the wind
person by the bus never getting in
and it sucks for them not to understand everything
but i cant exactly blame them and who would i not you
acting as if im a child that did wrong speaking to me in a soothing voice
talking me through as if i have no chice
WRITING, my goal to be somebody, a icon to grow from
but stuck in my hole i have nothing to go on
society put us in this hole even at the top of the food chain
still six feet under hidden from the rain
im sorry if you dont know where im coming from
but these are the bottles of feelings crashed on the floors
i would say goodbye but the pain held in the word
is enough to make the perfectly sane become insane like washing in the rain
a word said like a sigh but the meaning a bright light in the eyes
so for now saije
read the story its all mine
