Chapter 40
Nabitawan ko ang phone ko dahil doon, napahagulgol na ako. Naramdaman ko ang yakap niya sa akin, gusto ko nang sumigaw dahil sa sakit.
Alam kong may kasalanan ang Papa ko sa akin pero hindi na mahalaga iyon. Napatawad ko na siya roon at handa na akong makipag-usap sa kaniya, pagkatapos kong ayusin ang problema namin ni Zian. Pero bakit kailangan na maging ganito? Bakit kailangan siyang... mawala? Bakit kailangan na mangyari ito kung kailan gusto ko na siyang maka-usap?
"Kaitlyn... nandito lang ako." Niyakap niya ako nang sobrang higpit na para bang ayaw niya na akong pakawalan pa.
Hindi ako nakapagsalita roon, napayuko ako at muli akong napahagulgol. I can't lose him, I really can't. Pero, paano? Paano kapag dumating ang araw na kailangan ko siyang bitawan? Paano kapag dumating ang araw na kailangan ko nang umalis? Paano kung kailangan naming magkahiwalay para maging maayos ang buhay namin? Paano ko siya makakalimutan kung sakali? Paano siya... at paano rin ako?
Hindi ko alam kung ano ang tumatakbo sa isipan ko habang papunta ako sa NCH, sunod-sunod na tumulo ang luha ko. Gusto ko mang sumigaw ngunit walang lumalabas sa bibig ko, napakapit ako sa manibela at mas binilisan ko pa ang pagmamaneho ko.
"Kuya, nasaan kayo?" I asked.
"Room 121," he answered.
Mabilis akong pumunta sa room kung saan sila naroroon. Kabado kong binuksan ang pintuan, they looked at me. Tiningnan ko sila isa-isa, they all looked miserable. I saw who's lying on the bed, sabay na bumagsak ang balikat ko.
Kuya went to the couch, I stood up beside my father. He wasn't moving, he was sleeping but he is not breathing anymore.
How many times I wished that this is just a nightmare, that this is just a dream. But it wasn't, I had so many thoughts in my head. I cried so hard when I realized that it was so painful, it was hard to breath. I sat beside him and I held his hand, my heart was tired and my heart was broken into pieces.
"Dad, I'm so sorry," I whispered, I already catching my breath.
Two people in my life was already gone, it's three actually. My sister, my first love and my father already left me. Hindi ko na yata kakayanin kung may mawala pa sa buhay ko.
I noticed that they already left me to give me some privacy. I want to confess to him that I still love him. Although he hurt me before. I want to confess that I prayed before I forgave the people who hurt me, I want to tell him that I already forgave him.
"If you only know that I forgave you already. If you're still alive, I will do anything para bumalik ulit ang closeness natin. Dad, why did you leave me? Why did you leave your daughter? Why did you leave me?" I said while sobbing.
Hindi ko na alam kung papaano ako makakabangon o makakahinga ng maayos. Hindi ko na alam kung paano ako makakapagsimula, hindi ko na alam kung kakayanin ko pa ba.
"Dad, give me a sign if how will I forget of what happened on my past. Give me a sign if what I'm going to do," I pleased.
Pinunasan ko ang luha ko, nagulat ako nang biglang pumasok ang doctor.
"Sorry for disturbing you, I'm here to tell you that we will move him to the morgue." Nag-panic ako roon.
"But Doc, I want to spend more time with my Dad. Can we extend the date?" I begged.
"I'm sorry, Miss. But we can't extend the date, we are just following our rules," she said, I stared at her.
"Tell me, why did he had a cardiac arrest?" I pleased.
YOU ARE READING
Be my Boyfriend (Athenians Series #1)
Teen Fiction"She asked me to be her boyfriend and I said yes. That was the reason how our story started." Introduction: Athenians Series #1 Kaitlyn Smith met Kurt Enriquez, his first love, but her first love died. She was hopeless, unable to move on from her pa...
