The Silence is Over [Silence of the Lambs]

Two

I walk into work, hair dry after my run, to see my small team looking at me with--

What is this, pity?

I eye them suspiciously as I go through the metal detector then grab my things when they get past the conveyor belt.

"What?" I ask annoyed when I reach them.

My team, a group of men were in a circle around a desk. James, one of the best snippers I've ever met; Marvin, a hacker who was once an enemy of the state but now works for the FBI; and Ben, our muscle man.

"Clarice, they found-" Marvin started then stopped when silenced by a look James gave him.

"Well, what is it? Spit it out!" I say.

"Nothing."

"You sure?" I ask. It's not unlike my team to keep something from me just because I'm a woman.

"Yeah, i-it's nothing," Marvin says.

He excuses himself from our little circle, heading to the breakroom.

"Captian wants us in the war room in five." Ben grunts.

I nod, and walk away towards my desk, but not before I catch the two men giving each other a look.

I sigh.

When are they going to get it through their thick skulls that I am just as capable as them in this work area? Just because I'm a woman doesn't mean they should keep information from me. Whether it's suitable for a lady or not, I'm an FBI agent. I know what I signed up for.

Do you really though? A voice in my head whispers.

I try to silence it but it breaks through again.

You still have nightmares. Buffalo Bill did a number on you, although he never laid a hand on you. You don't deserve to have nightmares. He didn't do anything to you. Those girls are the ones who should be in your state. You couldn't save them all. You failed.

"I did what I could. I saved one before it was too late." I murmured, fixing myself a coffee.

Maybe caffeine is what I need. I'll be more awake then and these stupid voices will go away.

It was too late already. She might still be here on Earth, but her mind...she might as well have died. You didn't save her, you just made it worse. She probably wishes for death--

"SHUT UP!!!" I screech, and immediately notice the large number of agents who look my way cautiously. The whole office is silent and more than forty pairs of eyes are on me.

Feeling my neck heat up like an oven, I try to explain myself, "I-I...the coffee, uh-"

"Starling!" Ben nervously says, placing a hand on my arm.

"You good?" I notice I spilled my coffee all over the counter and floor when I had my outburst.

"Um, yeah...just...just spilled my coffee. I'm good." I shakily set my coffee cup down and grabbed some napkins to try to clean it up.

"Oh, uh don't bother those napkins just make it worse. I'll go get some from the men's restroom." Ben hesitantly placed a hand on my shoulder then turned and started walking.

"No, it's fine, I can-" I stammered, but he was already gone.

"Great. Just great." I mutter under my breath. 

Not only am  I the girl who shot Buffalo Bill and gained almost a celebrity-type fame in our little town, but now I'll be the girl that had random outburst talking to no one at all.