enduring love | miniminter

13

neither of them could blame what had happened the night before on the alcohol, they were only tipsy. but for some reason, it did not feel wrong.

as ivy stirred awake, she felt simon's limp arm resting on her waist. taking a deep breath in, her eyes slowly flickered around the not so familiar bedroom, but being laid next to simon felt like a commonplace. all she could think to herself was how could either of them come back from last night? it was just a silly mistake between two friends and two ex's, right? a mistake that was bound to happen, but one that should not happen again. their relationship already fell apart, they could not wreck their friendship over something that was in the moment.

maybe the two wanted to feel what it was like to embrace one another in that way again? maybe they wanted to bring back the past, even just for one night? whatever it was, ivy felt angry with herself for falling beneath the sheets with him when she was not certain about her feelings towards him and sleeping with him only confused them even more.

her mind wandered back to her argument with sage, acting as though she had no idea what she was blabbering on about when she did. she knew that she put up a facade around simon, to hide that somewhere, deep down, she was not certain she was completely over him. so instead, she acted as though she was, like she didn't care. but she did. because what would she gain from admitting she was still hung up on him? she was positive that simon had gotten over her, he was the one who suggested to be friends, he probably just wanted one night of fun with her; for old times sake. she had no idea how simon felt deep down.

waving her hand around beneath the pillow, she finally found her phone and steadily lifted it in front of her face, glaring at the numerous text messages and missed calls from sage and esme. ivy huffed, ignoring them as she was unprepared for the conversation with the two about simon, she was sick of hearing his name fall from their lips as all they wanted to chatter about was ivy and simon's relationship. she instead turned to twitter, slowly flicking through the trending page, but not really caring about anything on there.

simon shuffled next to her, a soft groan falling from his lips at the sight of the bright sunlight peeping beneath the blinds. waking up beside ivy, better yet, weakly holding her in his embrace, surprised simon - until all the memories of the previous night came flooding back to him. but what surprised him even more was how much nothing had seemed to changed, even waking up in their favourite cuddling position; spooning. taking a deep breath in, he gazed at her messy brown hair sprawled out on the cushion, his eyes following up and down her naked spine.

"morning." he muttered, slowly moving his arm from her to stretch his body out, but his eyes remained intently on her.

"oh," she cleared her throat, turning over to look at him, "morning."

"you alright?" he gulped audibly, now staring at her face. oh, how he missed that face in the mornings.

ivy held the covers tightly over her bare torso, slowly nodding her head in response, "mhm, are you?"

"yeah." he sighed, rubbing his eyes.

neither of them could admit with how not okay they were with the events of their night. they did not want to talk about it, it would be a tense and awkward conversation and one that would not be worth having. in their minds, all they could think was 'don't let it happen again', even though it definitely meant something.

they sat in silence for a while, scrolling through their phones. ivy hated it, the awkwardness felt as though she had just woken up from a one night stand with a stranger, not even remembering his name, never mind waking up to someone who she once knew so well. she desperately wanted to head home, but also dreaded the conversation awaiting her when she got there.

"i've got to go to a sidemen shoot soon." simon sighed, turning to face her, "so i could drop you off home now?"

ivy instantly let out a small sigh of relief, it was like simon could read her mind about her wanting to head home, "what, so you'll take me home and then come back here and get ready?"

"erm, yes." he nodded, staring at her with a confused expression.

"just sounds long," she chuckled, "i can get an uber."

"nah," he shook his head, sitting up against the headboard, "i'll take you." a small smile formed on his lips, he wanted ivy to stay in his bed all day, missing her touch and everything about her, but he knew that wouldn't be right.

"okay, thanks." inhaling deeply, she slowly lifted her head from the pillow and glanced at the many items of clothing scattered on the floor next to her.

simon steadily pulled his feet from the bed, stretching as a groan fell from his lips. he glanced down at the floor, instantly pulling a face of disgust as he stared down at the used condom on the floor. disgusted because it was an unpleasant sight, but also disgusted with himself for sleeping with his ex girlfriend - who he told himself to never allow something like that to happen with. picking it up, he quickly discarded of it and walked into the bathroom whilst ivy threw on yesterday's outfit. she raked her fingertips through her knotty hair, glancing at simon emerge from the bathroom with his toothbrush in his mouth. a smirk formed on her lips as she keenly watched him, cocking her head ever so slightly, not realising how powerful her stare was.

the two threw their bodies into simon's car, her hands grazing the smooth leather on his car seats, "nice car." she murmured, pulling the seatbelt over her body.

"oh yeah," he smiled softly, "you won't have seen this car." starting the engine, a 'you me at six' song blasted through the car speakers from simon's spotify and just to their luck, it was their favourite song 'loverboy' - one they always used to sing along to terribly - "remember when we saw these guys live with all time low in like 2015?" he questioned.

"mhm." she nodded her head slowly, staring out of the window, "was valentine's day wasn't it?"

"yeah." he laughed, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel to the beat as his focus remained on the road.

the car journey to ivy's fell completely silent, only songs that they once loved playing through the speaker in the most awkward moment. it left the two thinking about the times they spent together without even realising it or how they could be sat there singing along to the songs excitedly, rather than barely paying attention to one another and allowing the memories to run back to them.

"well," she cleared her throat, looking up at her block, "i'll see you later."

"yeah," he sighed, watching her open his car door, "bye." he awkwardly smiled as she waved to him.

"thanks. bye." ivy muttered as she slowly closed the door behind herself.

simon's eyes followed ivy walk inside before yelling, "fuck!" and throwing his head against the steering wheel. he knew he had to start driving again as he was parked where he shouldn't be, but he could not bring himself to. his heart sank to his stomach at the thought of last night, thinking about how badly he could have fucked things up between them.

a sickly feeling rose in her stomach as she finally made it to her door. she opened it wide, staring at her two friends sat on the sofa. "where the fuck have you been?" esme glanced at the time then back up at ivy.

"i've fucked it." ivy took in a shaky breath, bringing both hands to her face.

"what do you mean?" sage cocked her head, "what have you done?"

"i went to simon's." ivy mumbled with her head still thrown into her hands, whatever she had just said was barely audible to the two girls sat on the other side of the room.

"huh?" esme yelled.

ivy stood still for a moment, slowly moving her fingertips from her burning hot face. she picked at the skin on her lips between her teeth, her eyes slowly welling up, but she did not understand why. "i went to simon's." she murmured.

"shit." sage glared at ivy with wide eyes, not knowing how to respond.

"i'm guessing that you guys -"

"yeah." ivy instantly cut off esme and swiftly looked down at the floor, "i'm off to bed."

"it's one in the afternoon, ivy." sage sighed, watching ivy drag her feet in the direction of her bedroom.

"i know."