Forever and Always, My darling- V.H story

Chapter One

TW: Suicide, talk of OD on pills, talk of funerals. I think that's it let me know if there's anything im missing!!

April 4th, 2024

Y/N POV

Today's the day of Vinnie's funeral and I'm feeling so many things. Things like guilt and anger. I was his girlfriend of 4 years how did I not see the signs that he would do this. I'm currently in Seattle with his family and seeing them this broken and upset just make me feel even worse. His mom was a complete mess, I mean I would be too if my son died at such a young age. His dad tried to hide his emotions and it worked for the most part you'd only catch his crying when he thought he was alone. Then there was Reggie, sweet Reggie. He took this the hardest, him and Vinnie were best friends and when Vinnie moved to LA Reggie was upset but it was ok because they talked everyday. I believe Reggie blames himself for not being able to prevent this, we all feel this way. I'm currently sitting in Vinnies old room wondering were this all went wrong. I'm snapped out of my thoughts when Maria walks in the room.

"Hey sweetie were gonna leave to go to the viewing in a few minutes if you wanna come down stairs." she says in a whisper. I turn my head to look at her in the doorway and just nod my head, I get up and follow her down the stairs. It's so quiet in the house it hurts in a way. Were all use to Vinnie making a stupid joke and everyone laughing and just enjoying the moment. This whole situation feels like a horrible dream I just can't wake up from. Maria and I made it to the living room and Reggie and Nate were sitting on the couch. Reggie had this blank facial expression while Nate was just staring at nothing. Maria was the first to speak up " We should g-get to the car so we can see him before anyone else gets there" she says with a voice crack. We walk outside and it's sunny. "how can it be so sunny and beautiful out when were all going through something so painful" I think to myself. The car ride is silent no music, no talking just sniffles and breathing.

We got to the viewing and the workers greeted us with a look of sympathy on their faces. We walked over to the room that had his casket. It was an open casket after we all talked about it we decided to have one last look at him before we send him off for forever. I took very small steps over as I was the first one to see him in the casket even before I saw him the tears were streaming down my face and nothing was stopping them. When I finally saw him i thought about how peaceful he looked. We asked for little to no makeup on him and i'm happy we did because I got to see his face as I did when we woke up in the morning together, in bed, when we were happy and at peace. Reggie, Nate, and Maria all went and saw him as I sat in the first chair in the front row. I couldn't help put play with one of his rings I had on a necklace. It's actually the one I gave to him on our 2 year anniversary, oh how i wish we could go back to that time when everything was okay and he was still here with us. Maria came and sat next to me and grabbed me hand and just looked at me. She knew how hard this was for me for all of us. She said " When we went through his room back in LA we found a few letters and and one was for you. Everyone already opened theirs but your in no rush to whenever your ready you'll have it" she said before getting up to go and great a few family members and close friends and thank them for coming. I held the envelope with the letter inside and traced over the letters of my name wondering what he thought while doing this, wondering if he wrote this right before he took his life or if he wrote it days,weeks,months, or even years before. Everyone walked by and saw his body and we all got in our cars and drove to the church were we all had a ceremony and then off to the graveyard. This is the part I dreaded the most because here is were we said goodbye for the last time.

His casket was under the tent along with the rest of us. The priest was talking but I couldn't make out a thing he was saying, all of what was happening finally hit me and I had to sit down it was all to much. I collected myself the most I could and stood back up the priest finished talking and told everyone to move over to his grave. The four of us went to look one last time at him. This was the most painful thing I had to do. Not seeing him laying on his bedroom floor with a empty pill bottle in his hand, not calling his family saying their son had died, not having to buy clothes for my significant others funeral. This was and maybe won't be the most painful but definitely one that would scar me forever. I walked up with a heartbroken smile on my face and kissed his forehead and admired him for the last time. I stood and waited for them to say goodbye so we could walk over together. They lowered his casket into his grave and everyone threw flowers into his grave. This was it, this is the last time i'll see my beautiful boy again. Or so I thought...

A/N

soooo let me know what y'all thought of this. I feel like it could be better but its whatever rn. again it's my first story I've written so it's a working progress :)