SEPTEMBER 17 2017 EXACTLY ONE YEAR SINCE THE DISAPPEARANCE (the story will now take place from here on out. they're 17 now)
dear ethan,
it's officially been one year since i last saw you. i miss you so much. i just want to see you one more time. but anyway, i've been keeping this journal to update you on my life just incase you are to ever come back. and recently my life has been really good. grayson and i are closer than ever, i have a boyfriend now. his name is jake, he's absolutely amazing. i'm also captain of the varsity cheer team, just how i always told you i wanted to be. i've also met kaylin who's my best friend now. a lot can happen over the course of one year, i just wish you were here to witness it all. i miss you e.
love, jadei put down the black pen and closed the journal as i wiped the tears that had fallen. writing to ethan is something that has helped me cope. my therapist actually suggested it, and for a while i thought it was a stupid idea.
i always keep the journal hidden, in hopes to give to ethan if he ever returns. officers presumed he was dead, even though they never actually found his body. and somewhere, somehow, i know he's alive. it's like i can feel it.they had a funeral for him, even though they buried an empty casket. his family thought it was for the best and everyone should move on. it was so hard on grayson, he didn't leave his room for weeks.
how could they give up so easily? he's out there and i know it. it just sickens me knowing i can't do anything to find him.
i put my journal away and sat down on my bed, grabbing my phone when suddenly it let out a ding.
gray<3 :hey jade, are you busy?
me: hey and no why? is everything okay?
gray<3 :can you come over? i just really need someone to talk to right now.
me: of course. i'll be there soon. love you.
gray<3 :okay, thank you. love you too.
without saying anything else, i grabbed my shoes and my car keys and headed down the stairs.
"mom! dad! i'll be back soon, i'm going over to graysons for a little bit." i yelled by the front door so they could hear me.
"okay honey! don't be out too late you have school tomorrow." my mom responded and with that i was out the door and into my car.
when i pulled into their driveway it was only graysons car there. i got out and walked up to the door. i knocked a few times but there was no answer.
i decided to just try and open the door and it worked. i walked in, shutting the door behind me to the house completely quiet and still.
i walked quietly up the stairs into graysons room to see him sitting at the edge of his bed with his head in his hands.
"hey gray." i walked over and sat next to him.
he noticed my presence and wiped his tears and stifled his nose as if he was trying to hide the fact he was crying. "hey." he looked over to me and smiled, his eyes bloodshot.
i looked at with a worried expression and instantly pulled him into a hug. he didn't hesitate to hug back.
i rubbed my hand up and down his back while resting my head on his shoulder-him letting out silent cry's.
"i miss him so much, it hurts." he told me with a whisper. it hurt me seeing grayson in this state.
"i know gray, i know. i miss him too." we let go of each other and i grabbed both of his hands and held them in mine.
"do you think he's still out there?" he questioned looking down at our hands.
"honestly, i truly believe he is. it's like i can feel it grayson. he's out there somewhere." and i know i'm right. wherever he is, i know he misses us and one day i hope he has the decision to come home.
"but what if you're wrong." he let go of our hands and stood up running them through his hair.
"what if he's dead? what if he never comes home?" he slightly raised his voice while looking down at a picture of him and ethan.
"you can't think like that gray. have hope, that's all we can do right now." i stood up and walked over towards him.
"you don't understand jade. i can't keep living like this anymore! i can't live knowing that he might be dead!" at this point he was full on screaming and tears were streaming out of his eyes.
i stepped back at his sudden outburst, causing my eyes to tear up from seeing him this way."i'm sorry." he whispered. i walked over and hugged him. knowing that's all he needed right now.
"what if something happens to you and i loose you too?" he asked me. i pulled away and put both of my hands onto his cheeks making him look at me.
"grayson, i am not going anywhere. i promise." i looked straight into his eyes while wiping his tears away with the pads of my thumbs. i hate seeing people cry, especially the people i care about the most.
"i have to go. but if you need anything at all, just text me and i'll be back here within a heart beat okay?" i let go of his face and gave him one last hug. i wanted to stay and comfort him but i knew i couldn't.
"okay. i love you so much jade. thank you for everything." he responded as we slowly let go of each other.
"i love you too gray." i smiled and grabbed my things.
****AN: AAAAAHHH i love grayson and jades friendship. they're so cute. and yes they are JUST friends. but thanks for reading<3
YOU ARE READING
criminals e.d
Fanfiction"thing is, i cared about him more than anything else in the world. but it wasn't enough. he just left like it was the easiest thing in the world to do."