It's 5 o'clock somewhere

Thunder By Imagine Dragons(Give me dem Jesus bones)

It's 5 o'clock somewhere when Hot Pants threw her younger brother into the gaping jaws of the bear. Dat was kinda hot doe ngl. Da BAby dabbed and then fucking died.

HER BROTHER WAS DA BABY1!!!! I would hate myself too if I killed da baby...

Such talent went away too soon. Hottie Panties felt so horrible for acts against humanity that she became transgendered and joined a transcontinental horse race.

She was feelin herself when she met two gay fucking losers who stole her sandwhiches and then fucking sexually assualted her. But she couldn't lie to herself, she was kinda hornie on main. She was so hornie for those fucking sandwiches that she was considering committing two hate crimes against these motherfuckers.

She was so down bad that she decided right then and there that she would be committing murder once more and killing the fuckign preseident just because she could and he was a fuckign lsoer. She did this with the help of her best friend, Goro Akechi, who was also a flaming homosexual, but he wasn't cringe and cunty, unlike Johnny. FUCK JOHNNNY, ALL MY HOMIES FUCKING HATE JOHNNY.

So, after they made their game plan they went to the fucking bar bc why not its literally a horse race its not like they are on a timer or anuything omfg. Akechi ordered himself a gay drink because he's gay. It was when Akechi was taking a gay drink of his gay drink when suddenly they were in Washiungotn D.c listening to teh Mr president scream at the top of his fucking lungds "DOJAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~n" And then Hot Pants watched as Diego Brando shot Akechi in the back of the head.

BUT WHO COULD HAVE SHOT AKECHI?????

Then Whatcha Say by Jason Derulo played and everyone cried and went crippled, but before they lost feeling in their legs, they all did the Nae Nae, JUST LIKE DA BABY.

RIP TO MY MAIN HOMIE DA BABY how could hot pants kill da baby :(

Bruh Hot Pants was pissed bc she needed to find da Holy Dumptruck part of the corpse and the only person who knew where it was was Akechi "the dump truck" McGee. So in frustration Hot Pants went to the nearest brothel and killed a man. It was then that Hot Pants realized that maybe we all have a little dumpy in us all.

But then....she realized.....

Da Holy Dumpy was inside her all along. NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THE HOLY DUMPY OF DA BABY. BECAUSE THAT MAN WAS CHEEKEDDDD UPPPP.

Hilarious Valentine came up to her and was all up in her grill like "dis bitch got the holy dumpy....." and then pulled out his gunny.

"Did you wanna go to wendy's with me?>:)" So there Hot Pants was sharing a 4 for 4 and a chochy frosty with Mr President, and then they fucking fucked. RTight there in the fucking Wendy's. Right next to my fucking salad. After the fucking, da President was so hungie, so they drove to the McDonald's Drive thru, and saw this:

Hot Pants threw herself out of the car window, and got down bad with Akechi, The President clapped. The President then appointed Hot Pants as Chief of Staff, and Akechi was appointed Secretary of State.

Fucking Diego got a job at that fucking macdonald's and said "this rather cheeky innit."

The end.