Wishy Washy, at Best

Chapter one: Normal

I stare in curiosity, examining myself. I simply stare at the face that stared back from the cold mirror. Not a thing has changed from yesterday. Same curly hair in a messy ponytail, the same short 'curvy' figure, same tanned skin. My blue-green eyes changed though, but even that was the same routine. Same me. I didn't look any different then from before I graduated college. The door shook as a sudden banging awoke me from my mindless analization.

"Sammy, I hafta go pee!' Sally's voiced squeaked in alarm.

I open the door and welcomed her into the white bathroom. Still in her pink pajamas she rushed in to the toilet, in a blur. She sat on the toilet, then while looking around she was struck with disgust. She stared at me with those big baby blue eyes and a sneer on her face.

"I can't go pee with you in here." The statement seemed as if I were the six year old. I rolled my eyes. No matter how many times I told that girl, she could not seem to comprehend the fact that I changed her diapers.

I step out into the dingy hallway, slightly annoyed at her timing. Little girls! How could they be so stubborn! I'm the boss! I pay for you to have a place to pee! So pee when I say! Dang it! I sighed it wasn't Sally's bladder, or lack thereof, i was upset with. It is me, it is the not knowing. Now what? I couldn't drag the kids with me across the world, just so I could maintain a job. I couldn't leave them home alone either though. The thoughts plague my mind as I enter Billy's room.

The blue room was barely filled, but magically seemed to be a disaster area. With no closet doors, the mound of clothes seemed to be on display for all to view. The small dingy window let light stream in. Its unbalance frame over looks the crowded street. Letting us see the sad town that we live in. The room has always had a tenancy to remind me of all the money we didn't have, and of all the money i could make by taking this job.

I cross the small space to sit on his dinosaur comforter, which covered a small portion of his bed from the floor.

Billy pulled his shirt over his head, causing an even worse case of bedhead to take place. He looks like Dad. He had a tall, muscular build. He had tan skin, brown eyes and hair. Most of his features being a shade of brown caused his pink cheeks and white smile to seem abnormal.

"Mornin, Sam. You want to wrestle?" This was his routine. He always wants to play, even before we ate. His brown eyes wide with hope, becuase he knows that I was spending the day with them.

"We have to eat first, and you know it." I said just as I said everyother day.

The three of us meet in the kitchen, or at least what would pass as one. The crowded area was my own type of organized. The plates that were clean and trustable, meaning didn't have cracks, were stacked on the old counter. While the unreliable ones where in the cupboard. The sink is for the actual dirty dishes.

I make pancakes in the littlest frying pan you'd ever see in your life. With in minutes the 5 pancakes were slathered in maple syrup. Sally is talking about going to the park around her mouth full of pancake. Most of her comments muffled and lost in an unknown language, thanks to the overflowing amount of food in her mouth.

A buzz startled me, as vibrations go off in my pocket. I answer immediately knowing who it was.

"Hey,Kay." The kids went crazy. The noise level goes up about twenty notches. Sally stands on her wooden, and hopefully stable, chair speaking loudly and waving her arms. Billy starts to try and get the phone from my hands.

Next thing I know I'm promising to put her on speaker. As the first sound of her voice flows into the air the kids get wide eyed. Then the rush to tell our sister about their latest adventures.

I know, it seems like I'm the kids mom. They even used to call me mom. Plot twist I'm not. I'm not even their oldest sibling. I've learned that doesn't matter though. Especially not in our case.

We eat breakfast around the phone. The kids take turns telling Kaylie everything their heart desires. I only jump in to help translate....Stupid pancakes.

I finish the syrupy mess before the kids finish theirs. Placing the thick plate in the sink I pause.

"Then he showed us his claws," Billy is careful to make sure that every syllable he said was comprehended. There was pure silence from the other end of the phone. "He raked them against-"

"Billy! Where did you hear that?" I couldn't look him in the eye. He couldn't know, he is so young. Anger shakes my body. Never have I told him the stories. Never have I wanted to.

He stopped, he realized he is in trouble. He ran to his room. I'd have to get to him later. I crossed to the table.

"Sally, honey, I think your horse is in under our bed." She ran off squealing.

I took speaker off as I picked up the phone.

"Hey." I said lightly hopping she didn't recognize the story from so long ago.

"I didn't think you'd be telling them his stories." I flinched at the ice in her usually warm voice.

"I haven't been. I don't know how he knows it, but he does."

She let a deep sigh fill the line. "I guess its natural for us, to come up with those kind of horrors. Maybe it wasn't even the same story." A long pause filled the phone, until she broke it. "How are you?"

"I'm good. I finished college." Carefully I try to keep the conversation light, even through the dark in our world, in our past.

"That's great!" She knew what the end of college meant for the kids and I. Those seconds seemed to drag for hours. As the time dragged my eyes started to water.

"I'm taking them with me. I can't just leave them behind. Not with him." The words burst from my mouth without the approval of my mind. I took a shaky breath. They cant go through what i had to go through. I had to take the job, I had to take care of them. They won't end up like me. I wouldn't let that happen.