Crowley's Choice

Ch 2. Knights, Hamlet, And Crepe's

I was sitting in a thick mist by a campfire. I had been told that a soul had escaped and I decided to fetch it myself as it was otherwise calm in Hell. I was covered from head to toe in jet black armor. The people I had hired were laughing and drinking. My attention was suddenly diverted to a call from a certain Angel. I waved my hand to one of the people to bring the Angel to me.

"Hello? I, Sir Aziraphale of the Table Round, am here to speak to the Black Knight." Aziraphale called out. I rolled my eyes at Aziraphale's attempt to sound tough. I walked toward him through the mist to see the man I sent was leading Aziraphale back.

"Oh. Right. Um hello." Aziraphale stuttered in surprise.

"- Yeah, come." the man said moving toward me.

"- I was hoping to meet with the Black Knight?" Aziraphale asked unsure of his current predicament. I barely contained a chuckle at the awkward Angel. I emerged from the mist with my helmet down.

"You have sought the Black Knight, foolish one. But you have found your death." I intoned with a dramatic voice. Aziraphale's eyebrows furrowed at my voice.

"Is that you under there, Crawley? Crowley. What the hell are you playing at?" Aziraphale scolded. I rolled my eyes and lifted the helmet. I turned around slightly to address my people.

"It's alright, lads. I know him. He's alright. I'm here spreading foment." I said turning around at the last part. Aziraphale looked at me in utter confusion.

"What is that, some kind of porridge?" Aziraphale asked. I mentally facepalmed at the lack of knowledge the Angel possessed despite the fact he loved knowledge.

"No. I'm, you know, fomenting dissent and discord. King Arthur's been spreading too much peace and tranquillity in the land, so I'm here, you know, fomenting." I explained in a weak attempt to argue.

"Well, I'm meant to be fomenting peace." Aziraphale announced proudly. I nodded at the Angel thoughtfully.

"So we're both working very hard in damp places and just canceling each other out?" I noted. Aziraphale looked at me in surprise.

"Well, you could put it like that." Aziraphale admitted reluctantly. I smirked at the Angel.

"It is a bit damp. Be easier if we both stayed home. If we just sent messages back to our head offices saying we'd done everything they'd asked for, wouldn't it?" I offered nonchalantly. Aziraphale's eyes widened at the suggestion.

"But that would be lying." Aziraphale hissed. I shrugged not really caring either way.

"Eh, possibly, but the end result would be the same. Cancel each other out." I reasoned. Aziraphale looked conflicted and hesitant.

"But, my dear fellow well, they'd check. Michael's a bit of a stickler. You don't want to get Gabriel upset with you." Aziraphale protested with an air of worry and fear. I began to get impatient with the Angel.

"Oh, our lot has better things to do than verifying compliance reports from Earth. As long as they get the paperwork, they seem happy enough. As long as you're being seen to be doing something every now and again." I said biting back a rude remark.' Since when do I restrain my words?' I thought at the odd habit I seemed to have involuntarily made.

"No! Absolutely not! I am shocked that you would even imply such a thing. We're not having this conversation. Not another word." Aziraphale ranted as he turned around and stomped off. I lifted my arms in exasperation as I faced my people.

TIME SKIP

I was walking up to the Globe Theater to find Aziraphale who had popped up on my radar. I walked in to find Aziraphale was literally the only audience. I sauntered over to the Angel and stood next to him.