Relationship with the album:
I feel like I'm in an abusive relationship with evermore. It's one of my favorite Taylor Swift albums, but some of the songs are very close to home. The very thought of the album traumatizes me sometimes. This album came out exactly 11 days before I found out my parents were getting a divorce, and 1 day after we lost my aunt to cancer.
My mom said that she never loved my dad. I was so confused and heartbroken. Many words were said that could never be taken back, and Christmas Eve and Day were very devastating. I recently found out my mom had an affair, which did help clear things up a bit, but I don't know how our relationship will change because of that.
This, along with a couple other instances, led me to the depression I have today. I remember listening to the songs when I felt upset, and they will always remind me of that time in my life. Don't get me wrong, I still absolutely adore this album and I will continue to listen to it. What really sucks is that I have "trigger" songs😢 I still listen to them, but I can not hear them all the time. And I have certain lyrics that will trigger thoughts. These trigger songs are...
•'tis the damn season~ "I'm staying at my parent's house"
•happiness~ "In the disbelief, I can't face reinvention. I haven't met the new me yet"
"They'll be happiness after you, but there was happiness because of you"
"Leave it all behind, and there is happiness"
•coney island~ "I'm sitting on a bench in Coney Island, wondering, where did my baby go?
•long Story Short~ "long sorry short, it was a bad time"
•evermore~ "I had a feeling so peculiar that this pain would be for evermore"
•right where you left me~ "I'm sure that you got a wife out there, kids, and Christmas"
•it's time to go~ "Or trying to stay for the kids
When keeping it how it is will only break their hearts worse"
...Most of those are my favorites from the whole album.
Ranking:
In order from best to least best, because there are no bad Taylor Swift songs😌
The ranking was very hard oml especially from numbers 3-9
1. right where you left me
2. gold rush
3. Happiness
4. 'Tis the damn season
5. Tolerate It
6. Coney Island
7. Champagne Problems
8. no body, no crime
9. cowboy like me
10. Long story short
11. Dorothea
12. Willow
13. Closure
14. Marjorie
15. Ivy
16. Evermore
17. It's time to go
