7. This kind of desire leaves me starving.

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NICK’S POV

       Standing in front of the mirror with a tie in my hand and a smile on my face, I was the happiest person in the world.  Because today I drive Jordan to the firm I intern for and now him too.  I felt a childlike giddiness when I thought about Jordan working with me, near me, under—Yeah no, I am not going to think about Jordan being under me.  Even though we seem to be near each other all the time, it is not the case.  When he is home, he would be safely locked away in his room otherwise he would be reading with a don’t get near me vibe.  In college, we only have one class together and in it he seemed to avoid me.  Which is not a surprise.

       When I held him through his sobs, I thought we had a breakthrough but now I knew that it was just a crack in his armour.  I wanted to let me help him so badly but I knew it was not my place to make him feel to want me.  But I was a patient man I could wait forever for him to realise that I am not going anywhere. 

       With that in mind, I started to knot my tie around my neck.  The pale blue button down complemented the black tie with my black slacks.  The dark brown loafers shined on my foot.  When I completed the knot around my neck, I started messing up my hair with my free hand and applied some gel to make it look presentable. 

       It was eight in the morning, on Saturday.  Because of our lecture hours we can go to our internship at our own time but it should be decided before hand and written down on the log sheet in the front lobby of the firm.  The firm has pretty simple rules and the knowledge with the stipend we get after six month of continuance internship is pretty amazing. 

       Because it was a Saturday, there was no lectures and we decided to go early, so that I could show around Jordan the office.  Amelia already joined in the internship program but today is her off day as she worked yesterday for five hours.  I smiled to myself thinking about how it would be with Jordan along in my car, while loading my messenger bag with my laptop and a note pad with some papers I printed for my recent research for a case.  Even though the firm offered us with everything including a computer, I was comfortable with using my laptop because it had all open accounts of mine and I didn’t have to search for everything for minutes instead of a second.

       I just closed the zipper of my bag when there was a loud commotion just outside my room.

      “Shit, I swear woman you are making a fuss about it.”  Jordan’s voice boomed as I opened my bedroom door.

       Amelia was in front of him yanking his head down to her height to comb his hair, while muttering under her breath about how a child he was.

       I grinned.  Their friendship was the most unadulterated thing I ever saw.  When he saw me standing just outside his door, he blushed.  His cheek bones pinked and he bit his bottom lip ever so slightly.  My hands tightened on my side and I willed myself not to go near him and release his lip from his teeth and biting it myself.  My self-control has increased to a level where it was exceeding its maximum level.

        “Okay, okay, enough.  The tie is perfectly alright and everything is in place.  Now, leave me alone.”  Jordan grumbled but there was love in his eyes when he looked at her. 

       The unreasonable jealousy sliced through me again.  I knew that they both loved each other as close friends but it didn’t help that he was so close to her and not me.  And the way he was looking at her with twinkle in his eyes, I wanted that look to be thrown my way.  Even if it was less of an affection, I would have it.

        Amelia swiped at a fake tear.  “My boy is all grown up.”

        Jordan grimaces at that, I knew it would hit close to home as his mom is not here right now at one of his big moments.

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