Empty.

Chapter 2

    When I opened my eyes again, I could see color. Not only color, but all of the things that one could only see in the Before. There was a sky and, my God, it was blue; the clouds white and volumptious with shadowing no artist could ever capture. A black bird with sleek feathers brought me back down from figurative clouds, skewing my vision as it darted down, down, closer to me 'til it was level to the ground, skipping itself through the air like a flat stone across water. Noticing that there was in fact a solid and perceivable ground, I dropped to my knees and ruffled the grass, the gorgeous green grass, with my hands before ripping a couple handfuls out of the dirt, proving to myself that this was real. The sunlight was beating down on my back as I sat hunched over staring wide-eyed at the real, very real, very green grass poking out between the fingers of my clenched fist. I surrendered, closing my eyes once more as I sprawled out on the soft ground, letting the sunshine shine down, gentle and warm on my face. A second later, out of fear it couldn't be real, I squinted to make sure the sun was still there. It was, so I closed my eyes again.

    I felt myself stirring, returning to consciousness. The first thing I noticed was finally feeling rested after a long sleep. I rubbed my eyes briefly before opening them halfway. I wasn't in the grass anymore, no field laid out before me and it was dark again. It wasn't dark in the same way I realized, seeing the light just barely peaking out behind heavy,  almost-white blue curtains. I took in the rest of my surroundings; I was in a sort of hospital room, but I wasn't all hooked up and stuff. The walls were a few shades darker of a blue than the curtains, with two white stripes travelling around the four walls a bit below the ceiling. There was the one big window, and two doors, but only one of the doors had a high square window revealing what I'd expect to be a hallway. I didn't go out there, though. I saw a clipboard hanging on the end of my bed; it must have been my chart if I was in a healthcare facility. The page didn't have any clues as to where I was, but it showed a picture of me, pale with unbrushed, frizzy black hair and horribly sunken eyes, which were closed. They must have found me in the field, I remembered and continued to read the rest of the page.

    Jane Doe

    My name is Ruby. Ruby Miller.

    Date of Birth: 05/28/03

    I never told them that!

    Medical History: severe depression, suicidal, mildly destructive behavior, allergic to nuts, fear of heights and open water, broken arm at 5, likes dogs, prefers cats, no motivation, thrives in sunlight, lack of emotions, braces, 8+ hours of sleep...

    This list kept going on and on, weirder or more normal every time, about things it was impossible for them, partly anyone at all to know. I wasn't sure where I was anymore. This couldn't be the Before. It didn't make sense. None of it did and I never even thought to question how I got there. I sat sideways on the bed with my feet on the ice-cold tile floor. I peeled back those heavy curtains and saw nothing outside. It was impossibly bright and my mind was suddenly racing with questions of where I was and how i got there. I was so stupid to think that I got here without even trying. All there was was white. Blinding white nothingness. I let go of the curtain returning the room to mostly darkness and closed my eyes tightly and counted to five. 1..2..3..4..5, open!

    And it was empty. I felt a tear stream down my cheek, it felt hot and stung on my skin. It dripped off of my chin and I wiped my face in a child-like manner. It had all been a dream.