Chapter 17

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Amber

It was the week of the Homecoming dance and I ended up spending the first half of it unable to get out of bed..

The combination of too frequent of treatments, and the ever increasing doses had lead to the chemo kicking my ass. My mom had voiced her fears that it was too strong. That I couldn't live a normal life like this. Not when my body was wracked with crippling pain and I wasn't able to eat or drink without vomiting up the contents of my stomach. My dad had ensured us both that my body would get used to it. That it was better than the alternative.

I hadn't even been able to crawl down to the docks to let the water ease the pain. I had had to settle for baths in my jacuzzi bath tub.

Brad had come by multiple times, clearly worried. But I hadn't been much for company and he never stayed long.

Kelly had forgiven me once Lindsey informed her of the situation and they came by to veg and watch the Vampire Diaries. But still, they weren't the ones that I knew could comfort me. He couldn't come.

And maybe he wouldn't even if he could.

By Thursday I felt like a human being again and convinced my mom I was strong enough to go back to school.

Unfortunately, the reflection that looked back at me in the mirror was horrifying. I had never been one for makeup. But considering I was close to looking like an extra from the set of The Walking Dead, I made an exception.

No amount of makeup was able to completely erase the bags from under my eyes. And there was no way to hide the yellow tinge that had taken over the white of my eyes from the chemo affecting my liver.

At least my outfit was on point. With a short white pencil skit and black tank that was tight on the bottom with ruffles on the top that fell over my arms.

"You're looking good." Brad was waiting for me at my normal parking spot, which I had recovered now that the media had lost interest in the integration.

"Lying isn't very becoming of you Brad." Kelly singsonged coming up behind me and throwing an arm around my waist. "You looks like hell. But your outfits adorable. I might steal it."

"You can try." I laughed. I loved how honest she could be with me. Her and Lindsey were the only ones.

"You okay Amber?" A girl on the squad asked as we entered the building together and Lindsey fell in step with our group. "You don't look like you feel that good."

"Shut up." Kelly snapped, quick to come to my defense. "She looks stunning as usual." Typical Kelly. She could imply that I look like shit, but momma bear came out if anyone else dared.

"Love you Kells ." I sighed when we got to the history classroom door. Just the walk from the car to the building had drained what little energy I had. And I wasn't sure I was ready to face the alien on the other side of the door.

"You too." Kelly pulled me in for a quick hug. "Text if you need me."

Lindsey took over her place on my arm, somehow knowing I needed support just to get to my seat.

I felt him as soon as we entered, my whole body tensing in reaction to his presence. I looked up and saw the instant worry cover his face. We shared one look and somehow had a whole conversation.

"You ok?" His look asked.

"No." My mind screamed to his.

"Our beach later?" His eyes pleaded.

"If I make it that long." I silently begged that he take me there now. That he pick me up and run off to the lake with me. Pull me beneath the waves. Take away the pain.

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