internet idiots

Bully Eren Day [chapter 21]

"DIE YOU FILTHY RODENT!" Connie yelled as he started attacking Sasha, who wasn't expecting it at all.

"Get back!" she yelled, trying to get away from her bald friend who was attacking her.

"Ay! No hitting bitch!" you shouted at Connie as you started attacking him with your own sword, killing him within 3 hits.

"Why the fuck did you do that?!" Connie yelled, clearly disappointed with the situation.

"You hit bestie," you shrugged.

"But my fucking levels were high!" Connie scolded, "Plus, Sasha killed my chickens first!"

"Ok? What do you want me to do?" you sassed, collecting all the stuff he dropped and heading towards your's and Sasha's super secret base.

The two of you had made it late on a school night, and you two were the only ones who knew where it was and how to get in. You and Sasha had worked on a red stone device that only allowed entrance to the base if you had a very specific item. (literally got this idea from mumbo jumbo)

"What, where'd you go?" Marco asked confused. He had seen the whole thing, even you and Sasha disappearing into somewhere underground.

"That is none of your concern," Sasha answered, exchanging some things in her chest out for others.

"You have a secret base?" Eren asked out of nowhere.

"Alright, who the fuck snitched?" you sighed, looking away from your screen and directly into your camera.

"That's not important," Eren dismissed, "When the heck did you make a secret base?"

"If I told you, I'd have to kill you," you warned, not planning on giving away any information to Eren.

"Tell me woman!" Eren's voice got louder.

"Over my dead body," you hissed, you and Sasha both crouching down so your name icons couldn't be seen.

"You stubborn little sh—" Eren started to say.

"NO CURSING ON MY CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SURVER!" Armin yelled, well more screeched, before Eren was able to finish his sentence.

"You let everyone else say bad words!" Eren screeched back.

"No I don't," Armin monotoned.

"Y/n literally did like barely a minute ago," Eren said back, his voice matching the pitch that of Armin's.

"Yeah, well I'm his girlfriend's best friend, so he doesn't get mad at me," you cut in.

"I would be lying if I said she wasn't telling the truth," Armin admitted while killing off a creeper that was getting a bit too close to his farm for Armin's liking.

"But I'm your best friend! How the fuck does that even work?!" Eren slammed a hand on his desk while looking over at his blonde friend, a crazed look in his eyes.

"Language!" Armin shouted, "Also, I'm not scared of you. Annie on the other hand..."

"Serves you right," Annie said under her breath, making sure it wasn't easy to hear through her mic.

"Whatever," Eren grumbled.

"Anyways," Marco coughed.

"I want a tomato," you said out of the blue.

"There are some in the fridge," Mikasa piped up, keeping her eyes on her screen the whole time since she was currently building over a pool of lava in the Nether.

"But I don't like tomatoes," you sulked.

"..."

"Then why the fuck did you ask for one?" Jean asked.          (this is based off a real conversation i had. yeah, i was the person who asked for a tomato...)

"Because I want one, but they're so gross," you wailed.

"...You just let Jean curse," Eren said, still stuck on the topic from before.

"Shut the fuck up," Armin said to Eren.

"YOU'RE EVEN LETTING YOURSELF CURSE! HOW THE FUCK—" Eren started to yell.

"NO CURSING IN MY CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SURVER!" Armin shouted, cutting his brunette friend off.

"What is this? Bully Eren day?" Eren asked rhetorically.

"No, that's everyday," Jean commented.

"Ok, well no one asked for your opinion stupid horse face," Eren snapped.

"If you didn't ask, then why are you listening?" you asked, raising your eyebrow as you started building another Nether portal, one that would be in your's and Sasha's new base.

"You're going to have to synch that up," Annie said to you, looking over at your screen for a brief moment.

"I know," you pouted. Syncing Nether portals was not one of your favorite things to do to say the least.

"That sucks, ANYWAYS," Connie got progressively louder with each word, "GIVE ME BACK MY FUCKING THINGS!"

"What's the magic word?" Sasha asked, squinting her eyes as she did.

"Please?" Connie got calmer.

"Wrong," Sasha said simply. "It was lotion."

"You better give me back my stuff," Connie threatened.

"Or what? You're gonna find us and kill us? You don't know where we are fuckhead," you mused, an evil smirk spreading across your features as those words came tumbling out of your mouth.

"You know what? Fuck you," Connie hissed.

"Uh, no? That's my job," Eren quipped, a smirk of his own coming on his face.

"Stop!" you screeched, banging your head on the table out of embarrassment as your chat flooded with questions.

"Gah dayum," Mikasa laughed at the interaction, looking backwards and towards your embarrassed figure. "Eren do be teasing you."

"It's annoying," you groaned, though it came out muffled as you never once moved your head off of the table.

"Really?" Eren asked, fake-concern laced in his voice, "What a shame. I would stop, but I don't care. You say shit to embarrass me all the time."

"I hope both sides of your pillows are warm tonight," you grumbled, picking your head up and rearranging your headset which had been messed up in positioning when you hit your head against the table.

Eren gasped, putting a hand over where his heart would be as a look of pure hurt danced it's way onto his features, "You wound me!"

"Really?" you asked, "What a shame. I would stop, but I don't care."

"She used your own words against you," Jean cackled.